Or is that the Man of Morehouse? You all know that Morehouse is the pinnacle of the Black college experience. They are a proud, proud bunch of men.
You’ve got every kind of brother here. Bowtie Brother. Proud sweatshirt Brother. Dreadlock brother. Successful business brother…and if I wear this suit I’ll look like a successful business brother. I think when you get there you are a Man of Morehouse, and when you leave you are a Morehouse Man. Or maybe it is the other way around. The funny thing is it works both ways…that shit doesn’t make sense.
Well either way there are some brothers at Morehouse who are not happy this morning. Here is the 2008 valedictorian, Joshua Packwood.
Awwwwwww damn. Is nothing sacred? The white boy came in and dropped a 4.0 on Morehouse. Morehouse man, man of Morehouse. Nobody wanted to step up and box this dude out? You know, make him pledge Que or something so his grades would get jacked up for a semester.
You know the proud sisters of Spelman also thought they had found the ultimate white boy who appreciated Black culture. You know ol’ Josh had his killer crossover game tight. Even the most bohemian, poetry slamming, natural hair wearing sister gave Josh some play.
So this is to the men of Morehouse. You can’t let this happen again. Dude was probably an African-American studies major. You cats need to Man Up on this one. Make some study groups. Let the power of Black Pride make you wake up in the morning. You can’t just let a white boy roll up in the spot and establish himself as an authority on Black Culture. You can’t let him legitimize himself as the best of what Black institutions have to offer. First, you let a white boy do that, then next thing you know they are trying to take over the world. Is nothing sacred? Wait a minute. I just realized…I’ve got to go have a talk with Lake…dammit!
How did I miss the fact that this dude’s last name is “Packwood”? Is there anything more pimpin’ than that? With a name like that he was definitely up on the sisters. Is there a better white boy trying to pick up a sister name than that?
Spelman Sister: I don’t know. I’ve never dated a white boy before. I don’t know what that’s like.
JP: My last name is Packwood, baby. Pack. Wood. Know what I’m sayin’? I think I might have something you’ll like.
In fact, the interns were able to pull a pic of Playa Packwood and his girlfriend off the internets.
Josh is rocking the full on shadow and the bad girlfriend who I’ve got on good authority would fall into the “Us” category of body type. Nice work Josh!
By the way, Lake and I were discussing why a white dude as valedictorian of Morehouse hasn’t happened before. We realized that most white boys who bring the kind of academic heat to be valedictorian at a major academic institution probably isn’t electing to go get that “cultural experience” over at Morehouse. They are either down the street at Georgia Tech or they took that ride to Athens to chill between the hedges at Georgia.