Archive for the ‘Pac Man Jones’ Category

TO Uses Pacman at Cowboys Camp

July 31, 2008

With all the foolishness about Pacman Jones cats really forgot to remember whether or not dude is really that nice at football to begin with. I know he was a big draft pic and all, but TO really got him with this double move, peep it:

A little rusty hey there Pac? Look, it was all good when you were wilin out at the skrip club, whoopin ass, and causing general mayhem back in the day, because we all believed you were good enough to be worth the headache. But don’t let cats realize that you’re just another dude with a bad attitude along with a standard 3.2 year NFL career. Actually, let me get angle two on that joint.

All… Now see, you can’t let TO finesse you like that. The big thing with TO is that he can phys you up and THEN finesse you a little bit too.  Wouldn’t it be terrible if Pacman didn’t get reinstated after all this?  I mean, what is Roger Goodell trying to prove with that anyway?  I guess he’s just giving dude enough rope to hang himself.  Free Pacman I say.

– Lake

Sub-Prime Time? Pacman Jones’ Home Reportedly in Foreclosure

June 23, 2008

I just got word from my boy Brock that Adam “Pacman” Jones’ two million dollar home is presently in foreclosure.

I actually hate the Pacman Jones bashing because the way I see it, the dude hasn’t ever been convicted of anything and most of these alleged charges are just some unfortunate cats looking to get paid ala Eddie Murphy’s sprained eyes skit in Raw, but I just had to join the haters on this one.

Pac, daaaaamn homey, two years ago you was that maaaaan homey, seriously, WTF happened to you?

And you think dude would have learned his lesson what with all those terrible (and by terrible I mean GREAT) Credit Report Commercials.

“F.R.E.E. that spells free, credit report dot com babee, now instead of playing ball and livin’ phat, my crib is up for sale behind some trifling ass hood rats…”

Look, I’m about as white as it gets, but I still get a kick out of white dudes using “urban slang” in a slightly off key manner. Remember that hot Chicken McNuggets commericial?

“Ketchup and mayo…ketchup and maaaayo, McNuggets, McNuggets WHAT!…dippin it in that BBQ Sauce.” LOL. Maybe I’m a weird cat, but that shit is just funny to me. Oh and what about that garbage ass “freestyle” with this clown at the Taco Bell drive-thru?

Nice, your flow is only about 30 years old though pal. And is there a reason why these white dudes have to look like they’ve never bathed? I mean, for real, Mike D from the Beastie Boys was rhyming like that when Lake was in mink diapers, ya dig?

And you know that all these ads are coming from the same bullshit cat…Just writing rhymes and getting over. Wow, another major digression. Imagine that.

Ok, back to Pac. Somebody needs to tell this cat that this NFL money isn’t all that long lasting, ya know? You can’t be missing a full year of employment when the average lifespan of an NFL career is 3 years deep. And unless they legalize dog fighting or Pac mayne gets his own line of skrip clubs, somehow I don’t see Pac being very solvent a few years past playing. Homey best live it up now. Sure, we all know the story. He’ll lose all his damn money, show up in the XFL, Arena Football, CFL or the Surreal life or something, find Jesus and then he’ll be looking to be a minister/”help youth” not go down the wrong path. I hate to be so cynical, but it’s probably true.

Anyway, I feel for Pac and I hope he gets off to a fresh start out in Dallas with TO and company. Truth be told, I’m rooting for Pacman right now. I’d love for him to stick it in the face of all these haters who just use him to articulate their utter disdain for the un-sold black athlete.

– Lake

Jigga, Pacman Not Guil-tee

January 17, 2008

Well what do you know, that lawyer chick, Wanda S. Jackson (pictured below on the right), who inexplicably found herself trolling for hizzoes errr doing research in an ATL skin bar is dropping her claim that Pacman Jones sucker punched her.

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(Now we know why ole boy is looking at her like she’s aint got no sense)

Man, this is what I’m saying, cats are just hating on Pacman. And why wouldn’t they?

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(Is that the sign of the Wu on his chest?)

They know that his name alone is pretty much good enough to get a guilty verdict. Only one problem, young Pacman aint been found guilty of anything folks. Free Pacman and let him live his life. Homey aint doing nothing wrong yall…. Randy Moss neither.

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– Lake

Pacman is at it again!

January 16, 2008

In hater news, reports say that ole Pacman allegedly sucker punched a female lawyer at an Atlanta strip club the other night.

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I don’t know man. I mean, on the one hand, dude is obviously a wild boy for continuing to even go to strip clubs, period.

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Then on the other, punching out a female attorney in a strip club? Sounds fishy. I mean, what the hell is she doing in the skrip to begin with? And yes, UvT Legal got this picture of Attorney Wanda S. Jackson, the alleged victim, pictured to the far right below.

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I think ole boy’s expression on the far left pretty much sums it all up for me. What the hell is THAT chick doing in an Atlanta strip club in the range of Adam Jones’ fist anyway? Damn, baby girl is looking a lil bit WNBA-ish if you ax me. Shouldn’t she be kicking it at Club Cheetah (with Da Brat), Club Amnesia (with Queen Latifah), the Peanuts in LA (with Cheryl Swoops), or Bubblin’ in Dublin (with oh I don’t know, Tyra Banks)…

“Can’t deny me, why would you want to, ya need me”.

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Yo, just look at the woman’s face now.  Whatever Wanda is saying, it must be akin to that alleged right rook Pacman landed because this woman just look 2 parts bemused and one part sick and tired of being sick and tired.  Either way, the shit is funny to me.

Hmmm.. Let’s take a hard look at Attorney Wanda.  Man hands, ten days past due on that touch-up re-up and nary a hint of much needed make-up to smooth it all out — but yet she’s in a bar full of NFL grade gyrating arse and breast-tah-sis? Something doesn’t add up. And then there’s her statement about the incident:

I was sitting in the office and he lunged at me numerous times in an effort to do grave bodily harm. [Then] an owner, went into the hall to deal with a member of [Pacman’s] entourage. I followed to gawk. He was in the hall, surprisingly reached over or around a security guard and sucker punched me in my left eye.”

You followed to gawk? Who talks like that… He lunged at you to “do grave bodily harm”?  Right, sure he did.

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Terrible. I’m not sure if Pacman got a solid blow in, but talking like that and you’re certain to catch an ass whoopin the next time you’re trolling for freak nasty skripperz errrr doing research in dancing establishments for your corporate law practice development. What a joke.

Yall leave Pacman alone…OJ too.

– Lake

Pacman takes to the ring

August 13, 2007

Adam “Pacman” Jones took to the ring Sunday night after obtaining a settlement from his former team, the Tennessee Titans, to perform at the TNA wrestling event.

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(he looks ‘torrible’ by the way)

If you hadn’t heard, Pacman was bared from wrestling at the event by the team via a temporary restraining order. So let me get this straight, Pacman can’t play football or earn a living for a full year and you’re damn near certain to be cutting him after he’s done playing for you, but now you’re making it so that he can’t wrestle either? Is this the NFL or the Stalinist Soviet revolution?

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Sure, some would say Pac could be injured, but is there anything in this world safer than wrestling? NFL training camps are like downtown Baghdad compared to pro wrestling. And it’s not like Pacman is some sort of punk, dude plays pro ball and is a known thug… they should be concerned about what damage Pac is gonna do, not the other way around.

Anyway, Pacman’s attorney, who must love him right about now, brokered a deal which allowed Jones to attend, but prevented him from having any actual physical contact. What a joke the NFL is… All these silly rules and garbage ‘crack downs’ and for what?

Pacman at it Again

June 18, 2007

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Is this cat serious? In a bizarre twist, Blinky aka the Po-lice are seeking Adam “Pacman” Jones for questioning in a shooting….AGAIN. Supposedly the Pac Mayne took time off from eating round, pearl-like spheres to give this comment:

F&ck the Po-lice

Damn homey, in ’06 you were the man homey, what the F8ck happened to you? Developing