Archive for the ‘Johnny Fairplay’ Category

Survivor: Fans vs. Favorites

February 8, 2008

Check out our updated Survivor coverage of The Finale and Parvati’s win of Survivor: Fans vs. Favorites and Erik’s unbelievable Stupidest Survivor Ever Move.

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Survivor is back with Fans vs. Favorites.

Jeff Probst is a pimp, This cat comes in flying on a helicopter. Was that real?

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So when everyone is getting introduced, how the hell do they already know James? Didn’t the last show just end two months ago? I guess the game only takes 40 days tape, but damn, they’ve got to be editing the last shows right now.

As predicted Jeff has a little struggle with Parvati’s name. He was super careful when he said it. Welcome back Par-vat-tee.

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Welcome back indeed. Parvati is hot by the way. The new pics from CBS don’t do her justice. . She’s tightened it up. New Tattoo on the back too. In other news, Amanda put the ass away. I guess she really did watch her season and get some new gear. Her shorts are way bigger. They don’t even have to blur her out. We used to get this:

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Now she’s got it all covered up.

I guess Johnny Fairplay got his teeth fixed from this. He’s still a jerk, he dresses like Jeff, still an asshole. Great joke though. I appreciate the fact that Jeff recognized it instantly.


Once again, Johnny Fairplay still isn’t coordinated and still complains like punk. How are you going to let Yao Man punk you like that? Seriously, how do you get tackled by an old man?

The good thing about having experienced players and big fans is that they can’t catch them with those rookie mistakes. I’m surprised Amanda and James didn’t show up dressed like Joey wearing all of Chandlers clothes.

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Is this chick Kathy serious? She just asked the gay dude if he wants to be a woman. Then she goes to ask about tracy’s boobs, asking to get a squeeze. Damn she’s annoying me. She’s stomping through the game like a damn fool. She’s going to get clipped as soon as these cats get the chance, that “Big Bird” nick name is perfect. I wouldn’t be surprised if she asked Jeff about where fire comes from. Hopefully she is just playing the rube, because no one who has ever watched survivor should ever be that annoying on the first day.

Daaaaaamn! The favorites start building shelter like it is damn Home Depot. Ozzy is getting food, and Parvati is flirting. These cats really are pros. Yao-Man just made fire with a pair of glasses, a drop of water and some coconut husk. This dude is the jungle MacGuyver…I mean Yao-Man is quietly one of the best players ever. He goes hard. How doe she know all of this stuff? By the way, is James really going to fall r the game Parvati is laying down? I mean he scooped her up like Tarzan and Jane. here’s my question, last show he was saying the turrible lunch lady chick would be in trouble if she was single, now he’s pushing up on Parvati? What is this dude’s type? Outdoorsy? Not having showered for at least 48 hours?

Seriously though, how is this cat Johnny Fairplay flipping on cats before they even get to the first reward challenge? I know you need alliances in Survivor, but damn these cats are plotting before anything goes down.It really makes it look like Fairplay was never planning on staying.

Haaaaa! Eliza just caught an eye jammie! She’s hurt for real too. She did not like that. Lake and I disagree on Eliza too. I think she’s pretty decent.

Johnny Fairplay is pulling the “I don’t want to be here” card. He’s probably nervous that he is gonna be kicked out first as the biggest asshole in Survivor history. Is Johnny really about to quit for real? Jeff hates quitters. This tribal counsel was probably hours long. Wow, Johnny Fairplay just tapped out. What the hell did he come for? The pre-show publicity? He couldn’t have planned to tap out like that.

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Peace out Fairplay. That dude apparently banged out Real World alum Tonya Cooley, proud holder of the thick white woman award, so he’s not a total fool. We’ll see how this shapes up. The first episode was pretty boring. We’ll peep the rookies next episode.

-Brock

F*ck with Lake Day: The Lake is an A$$hole edition

October 6, 2007

So I put together this great breakdown of the Johnny Fairplay incident, and this cat Lake just goes ahead and jacks my story!  So here’s what we’re gonna do.  I’m posting mine and we’ll let the readers decide who’s is better.  We already know who the ladies like more (If you could start marking the personal messages NSFW I’d appreciate it…thanks ladies), now let’s see who’s funnier.  I’m declaring October 6, 2007 as War on Lake Day.  You better come strapped homey!

Here’s the article.  Vote in the comments. Here’s the link to Lake’s original effort.

Whack on Whack Crime: When Losers Attack

Oh this is great.

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Johnny Fairplay, professional a$$hole, famous for pretending like his grandmother died on Survivor: Pearl Islands to get a competitive edge, was doing his shtick at the Fox Reality awards when the equally unstable Danny Bonaduce hit the stage to let him know that people really don’t like him.

That fall is exactly what you don’t want. (unless you are watching it on YouTube, then it is exactly what you do want.) But only a pretty uncoordinated dude actually doesn’t have the reflexes and physical wherewithal to catch himself before his teeth hit the stage.

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I guess Danny wanted to let people know that he wasn’t the fresh faced kid that everyone remembers from the Partridge Family. Danny flexed on ’em afterward too while Fairplay promptly exited out the back.

Danny looks like he might be on that Barry Bonds, Carrot Top program though.

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So apparently Fairplay has to have three teeth replaced and wants to sue. Interesting legal question…when a grown man straddles and humps you (unsolicited contact if I’ve ever heard it) what level of force are you allowed to use before you are the one charged with assault? When I saw Danny get my man up in the air, I thought he was about to go for the Undertakers ‘Last Ride’. It could have been waaaaaaay worse. Plus Fairplay has been recorded putting sh*t in people’s bed, getting drunk and violent, having sex with Tonya from Real World [NSFW, or for sexual relations for that matter], so he clearly has no limit to what he is capable of and little regard for himself or the welfare of others. I’d throw his ass too.

-Brock

Damn homey, on Survivor you were the man homey!!!

October 4, 2007

What the f*ck happened to you?

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Damn, one of my favorite villains from Survivor, Johnny Fairplay, got worked over by Danny Bonaduce at the Reality TV Awards (what?). Anyway, the whole exchange is hilarious, but just watch how that cat Fairplay walks off the stage.. Classic!!!

Freaking hilarious.

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How many times did you see that exact same scene in High School, Class Clown v. Class Dick.

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Winner by knockout, the Dick. Supposedly Fairplay is “pressing charges” whatever that means. I guess that’s the opposite of the “stop snitchin” campaign. Anyway, here is the aftermath of it all with Fairplay talking about his injuries and wild Danny Bonaduce saying he was only defending himself.

Good luck with that defense. Hilarious, all around.

– Lake (laughing)