Irony Defined: Carmelo Anthony’s new Nike commercial

Have you seen Carmelo’s new Nike Commercial?

Now I like the guy, and he is a beast on the court. But I know good and well Carmelo is not hitting the weight room. He definitely isn’t on some old Rocky type dragging bricks workout.

Look at that dude’s arms. Has he ever seen the weight room? The kid still has the babyface. He’s a great player because he is just better. He’s 6’8″ with speed and hops. The dude barely looks like he’s trying out there, but he’s still killing cats.

Even Allen Iverson is more diesel than that dude and he only weighs a buck sixty-five.

Flex on em AI.

On the upside, Melo did wife up La La. Is she hot?

Iiiiiontknoow homey. I’m gonna need to get a few more angles on that. But it ain’t lookin’ good. She’s no Ananda. She’s also no Free. She’s got Rocsi though.

-Brock

“USA-USA-USA” – USA Basketball back on top?

Kobe, LeBron, Melo, Dwight, this is why they’re hot.

Listen, I know it’s relatively inferior competition, but you just have to love what the USA is showing us at the FIBA Americas Championship tournament in Las Vegas. Just like last summer, Carmelo is showing us why he’s one of the most complete players in the whole world.

Homey is simply unstoppable, point blank. I mean, if you try to man him up with pressure D, he can put it on the floor and slash to the rim. If you try to lay off him, he’ll J you with that killer jumper. If you try to body him, he’s got that killer baseline turnaround game and when he’s really on his game, he’s a highly proficient rebounder, garbage bucket guy. He’s truly the perfect weapon. The only thing about him I don’t like is his seemingly mental midget status with that “stop snitchin” foolishness and of course, his random choice in lady.. La La.. don’t get me wrong, La La is cool..just too old for a cat who has no business being married before he’s 38. At any rate, Melo.. we here at UvT sports salute you.

LeBron has been LeBron, he’s dominating. He’s ubiquitous. He just muscles cats with that overly physical brand of play.

I mean, he really is that King James cat. The crazy thing about LeBron is how much better he could be. His jumper is anything but consistent, he rarely uses his left hand and his D leaves plenty to be desired. Still, you gotta love what LeBron has done for Team USA.

Finally, the man who has made it all come together is Kobe. I mean, what can you say about Kobe Bryant that hasn’t already been said about . It’s just the best of the best.

He brings crazy talent, work ethic, a jumper, killer D, swagger, attitude, I mean, dude is the best player in the world and it shows out there. Kobe just has that next gear that other cats don’t have. Honestly, I don’t see a need for Dwayne Wade when you have a Kobe out there who can score, pass it, and defend them. He threw a hot alley op to LeBron James in the first half of the Puerto Rico game. Unbelievable.

Look, Dream Team these guys are not… and the international quality of play has increased exponentially. But I can honestly say with this team, USA has a good a chance as ever and should be a prohibitive favorite to bring home that Gold Medal in Beijing. Nice work fellas… Good lookin Coach K.