As you can see from the banner up top, my man Lake and I were brought up in the era of classic Mike Tyson. Back when he would knock a cat out in 90 seconds, when he could get off four or five punches in a second, back when you had to read that blink and twitch with precision in Punch-out! or Little Mac’s ass was on the canvas. So we still pay homage to the man himself in the most ironic picture ever. Killer Mike with the tattooed face, yukking it up with a fresh Half-Caf, Soy, no foam, grande, extra-biyaaach, double sweet Caramel Macchiato. Does it get worse? Well, the regular readers of Us Verses Them know I wouldn’t be talking about it if it didn’t….Hell Yeah it gets worse.
Got damn Mike! How many of those coffee drinks did you have? When was the last time you were in a gym? I mean that sexy-man smedium shirt you have on isn’t doing you any favors with those young ass sleeves. Your Gucci shoes look like you’ve been playing outside all day like you are 12 years old, scuff marks and everything. Then the jeans. Have you been shopping with ARod at the Turrible Gear section of the mall again? On the strength of this pic alone, you are a first ballot inductee in the Turrible Gear Hall of Fame.
UvT readers…remember, fit is everything. Iron Mike has it so bad, I really can’t tell if his gear is too loose or too tight. Everything he has on is both at the same time, and he is on the red carpet! Can’t take it.
By the way, when I say lay off the Ho-Ho’s I mean the food, not the ladies. You know the boys over here would never support that. In fact, I’ll put you on the UvT workout plan.
Take two of these, and the pounds will melt right off.