So I’m flipping through the channels last night and hit CNN for a quick update on the RNC. I see Campbell Brown going at it with a McCain spokesman. I don’t really recognize the dude, but he is the typical talking head. Campbell caught him with a wild question on Sarah Palin’s big executive decisions as President of the PTA, Scout Leader of Brownie Troop 523, Mayor of Saytheweezybaybee, Alaska or whatever she’s been doing when Campbell says, “Tucker, answer the question”. That gets my interest, so I look up.
Daaaaaaamn. When did Tucker Carlson become a McCain spokesperson? I knew Tucker Carlson lost the bow tie a while ago, but the haircut really tightened him up. He actually looks like a respectable human being now. He lost the shaggy, high school haircut and actually looks like a grown ass man.
Then I went looking for him today, and that’s not Tucker Carlson. It’s some dude named Tucker Bounds. Unfortunately, Tucker Carlson still looks like this.
Damn, I guess I gave you too much credit Tuck. Here is a free piece of advice though. Take the picture above, print it out, take it to your barber and say “give me this”. You are 39 years old, and it is time to start looking like it. You still look like a real life Richie Rich to me.
The Tuckers really do look alike though don’t they? That dude is like Tucker 2.0. Either that or all white dudes look alike to me. One or the other, I can’t tell which one it is yet.
-Brock
Us Versus Them 