Thick Sorta-Rican, Likely Asian Woman: Tila Tequila Got Ass?


You know we try to keep an eye out for unexpected arse and thickness.  I mean, sometimes it just jumps up out of nowhere.  Remember the Badu sightings of ’07?

Ahhh, yes, it’s like where were you on 9/11.  Discovery of dat ass was truly a defining moment for me and I remember it well.  Honestly, just for context, look at what that clown mirror ass looks like from the side, found below, and just ask yourself what the composition of that tail must be like up close and personal.

Seriously, ponder that.  HARD STOP.

Moving on.  What about that thing that jumped up and attached itself to Angela Simmons?

That was so crazy that the only supporting evidence we could find to verify its legitimacy was the fact that Bow Wow was supposedly hitting.  Well, here’s another one.  Peep Tila Tequila’s act:

Say what?  What the farg am I looking at?  Oh wait now, I’mma need me an angle two on that!

Daaaaaayum.  Tila is thicker than a mug!  Had I known this I wouldn’t have stood still while she hooked up that “I kissed a girl and I liked it, taste of her cherry chap stick” special on her show.  Sheeeit, I like this.  Let’s go ahead and just make this an “All Tila’s Undiscovered Ass” kinda day:

Saaaaay whuuuuud?!  Damn, what three inches of rotation can do!  Blasted cameramen!  Curse-ed Lycra!  Now see.  Let that be a lesson to you budding Assologists out there.  My grandpappy warned me of fools tail like this.  He said, “Boy, believe half of what you see and this chick here!!!”  Or something like that.  Stuck with me to this day.  Oh well, at least we’ll always have those Tila NSFW pics.  Peace.

– Lake

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11 Responses to “Thick Sorta-Rican, Likely Asian Woman: Tila Tequila Got Ass?”

  1. KIR in NV Says:

    This skank is giving my beverage of choice a bad – as in NOT GOOD – name.

  2. Lake Arlington Says:

    “Bad meaning bad not bad meaning good!” A truly great line from Run DMC. This is definitely a skank special with extra ahnt on top. No question about it. I stay away from all forms of tequila.

  3. Stizzo Says:

    First of all tequila sucks, unless its a margarita. Second of all… I dunno, she’s 4’11” and wearing some six-inch heels, it’s not that hard to look that thick with that combination.

  4. KIR in NV Says:

    More for me, thanks. Nelly and I gonna do some body shots with that Patron anejo.

  5. Todd Says:

    I’ve never understood Tila Tequila’s appeal or popularity. Peeps actually think she’s hot?


    Ol girl has zero body (yeah, I said it). Not to mention that bobble head/martian dome thing she’s got going on is a complete turnoff.

  6. otis Says:

    yeah so those heels made her tail pop off cause its a well known fact asians faces are flat like they whole body

  7. Will Says:

    I met Tila ‘Tequila’ waaaaay back in 2000 in Seattle – when she was still Tia Ngyuen …she actually looked better then. She still had her ‘natural Js’, she had more curves, and that young babyface freshness look going for her. She did not age well. imo.

  8. Jackson Says:

    I’d still hit as would 90% of the dudes in the world. She’s hot.

  9. otis Says:

    oh and i wanted to add umm i was catchin the end of 106 and park and i saw keyshia cole and i demand more coverage cause she spun around and i seen the straight she is carryin on her backside good god it was nice

  10. Will Says:

    @Jackson: True, true.

  11. soko Says:

    Is a woman writing all of this housewife gossip column type stuff? Who cares who was wearing what where, and all this ghetto mentality nonsense? straight silly.
    Nice looking women but all the rambling and pettiness is not what guys do. well straight guys, anyway.

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