Posts Tagged ‘Pepper Knuckles’

Somebody’s Gonna Catch an Ass Whoopin!

May 8, 2008

Damn. Have you ever been whooping somebody’s ass, and thought…”I could really be whooping so much more ass right now?” Well, we’ve got the product for you.

Pepper Knuckles?!?!?!? With the tagline, “To Protect and Hurt”? Daaaaaaaaaaamn. Let’s see. Pepper spray is designed to immobilize your attacker so you can get away. A little element of surprise, a little searing pain and you can go on your merry little way. I’ve even seen pepper spray with dye in it so the green faced asshole can be found later.

But with Pepper Knuckles, after your assailant is rolling on the ground clutching his eyes you can administer a vicious beatdown so that they never do that shit again. If you are being attacked and are safe to get away, but go back to whoop some ass…is that still assault? I’m thinking probably.

What’s next? The Chainsaw gun from Gears of War?

So you can shoot a cat then saw off their leg?

How about a Taser baseball bat combo?

Don’t tase me bro! bzzzzzt…ieeeeeeeeeaaaah, aaaaaaaaaahhhh Now, don’t beat me bro!

Damn, I don’t want to run into one of these in a dark alley.

-Brock