Posts Tagged ‘NBA’

From Handchecks to Phone Checks

July 31, 2008

There’s something new in the world of “you can go to jail for that?” news.  Ex-NBA ref Tim Donaghy was just sentenced to 15 months of prison time for giving inside tips on games. At best, that means he was tipping people off when Chauncy Billups needed some extra tape on his ankles, at worst he was calling too many charges and bumps in the lane.  For some reason, that means that Donaghy pled guilty to felony conspiracy charges.  Conspiracy for what?  Conspiring to make some loot on a game.  Altering the outcome of a game?  You go to jail for that?  Look, I get perjury.  You lie under oath and you gotta go.  But making him go to jail?  That ain’t right.  Pete Rose is the most notorious gambler ever and he just can’t get into the hall of fame, he never went to jail.

Anyway, here are a few tips for Tim while he’s in the ol’ hoosegow.

First, prey that no one in jail never sees this picture.

I don’t know what you were doing, but it is going to be interpreted differently on the inside.  Also, you might not want to do this either.

Unless you are huddled out in the yard shooting craps.  Otherwise, you should keep your head well above crotch level at all times.

Finally…

If a bald brother with a handlebar mustache creeps up behind you anytime in the next 15 months, you might want to watch your back.

Phone Check Fool.

-Brock