Posts Tagged ‘lonny baxter’

Zeros in a Half Shell: Maryland Basketball disgrace

October 4, 2007

More evidence that Thug U lives in College Park Maryland.

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Of all the scholarship players who entered the Maryland men’s basketball program between 1997 and 2000 NONE of them graduated from the University of Maryland. Maryland was the only program in the country that failed to graduate any of its recruits within six years, a NCAA statistic analysis showed today.

random_gary.jpg (Maybe Gary should concentrate more on the books and less on liquor, young/supple arse and chicken wangs)

The program’s graduation success rate, calculated by an NCAA formula, fell for the third straight year at a time when graduation rates are rising nationally for men’s basketball programs. The number shows that none of starters and top reserves of Maryland’s 2002 national championship team graduated within six years of entering school (Really? I thought that en route to busting caps off at the White House young Lonny Baxter would have picked up his degree in Thugology, HomoThug Anatomy or whatever it is you guys “study” at that place).

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These people are very successful people,” Maryland coach Gary Williams said. “If you go to school to improve yourself economically, where have they failed (same place you have, in the classroom)? They make more than the average college graduate. Far more. If you’re judging them just based on getting a degree, then OK, they haven’t gotten a degree.”

HAAAAAAA and you wonder why his players don’t graduate. Nice attitude G. Maybe if you didn’t sit around figuring out how to improve YOURSELF economically and concentrated on what is right, which includes, but is not limited to, getting a damn college degree, your team wouldn’t be DEAD LAST in the entire nation for academic standing. I mean, you make the Maryland Football team look like, nah, forget it, they may have a better graduation rate than you, but they still look like some damn thugz….

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(look at this Maryland student after a big win against Duke, these cats are animals)

I know, I know, Maryland’s academic standards are waaaaaay up. I know. I’ve heard it before. And all those rioters that burn cars, destroy property and beat the living snot out of random people are just townies from PG County looking to cause trouble. I know. But what about this riot tape from the 2002 National Championship “celebration,” looks like students to me:

Hey Murrland, you haven’t been a serious contender for the National Title since Juan and Machine Gun Lonny left. You’ve had more players arrested and suspended in the past four years than you’ve had recognized for any ACC or National Awards. Your recruits suck so much that no national recruiting analyst even takes you guys seriously (and Gtown is whoopin your candy ass in these recruiting battles every single year!!!) anymore. Your arena is a testament to your complete lack of class and Gary’s penchant for placing cash in his sweat infested grubby little pockets (and by the way, Comcast cable sucks..believe me, I have it)!!! Finally, your fans are the lowest form of humankind.

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Believe me, Duke grads know this to be true because most of you miscreants end up washing our cars, mopping our floors, changing our oil, serving us our fries or receiving dollars from us at the local strip clubs.

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YOU SUCK and you’ve been exposed for exactly what you are, a bunch of losers whose only delight comes from the occasional upset of a real program (with real recruits who actually graduate) like Duke, UNC, Wake, really, the entire ACC.

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You’re a joke. Go back into your shell or go home and brush that tooth.. You will not make the NCAAs this year. You’re incoming class, outside of Braxton Dupree (and even he isn’t that hot) is a joke and your coach is more of a spaz than Psycho Tea.

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(Stop cryin’)

To say your squad is suspect this year would be a gross understatement, hell, there isn’t one cat on the team worth a nickel except Greivius Vasquez and I’m sure yall pay him in pesos, not dollars, so I’m not even sure how that gets worked out. Enjoy the year and enjoy having had the rare distinction of being DEAD LAST in all of AMERICA in graduation rates. No child left behind? Even George Dubyah would be a genius compared to you losers. Now get back to washing my car and don’t forget wipe down my rims. You know the BMW Cabrio has a tendency to accumulate a lot of break dust, especially on the front tires.. OUT.

– Lake