Posts Tagged ‘Kristen Bell’

Mini Thunder: Tiny Tail Appreciation Day

May 22, 2008

Sometimes you see something that let’s you remember what the days were like before the Vida Guerra and Angel Lola Luv or even Jessica Biel thunder storms were embraced in mainstream popular culture.  Yep, this chick’s ass has that old school “it’s tiny, it’s tooney” sex appeal and I don’t mind admitting that I do in fact like it.

Now see, I think we’ll need to run this tail through Brock’s assology tests, but seeing this reminds me how these skinny lil chick truly ran shit back in the Hair Band-Heavy Metal days.  Side angle please.

Now see.  This is where you really separate the thunder from the thunderette.  That side view is oh so informative and it doesn’t lie.  There really isn’t much depth there at all, but what’s there is shaped fairly well and as Andre 3000 said, it’s “something that fits well on her body.”  But let’s face it, the thigh is neither here nor nigh and you couldn’t scrape up enough leg meat to make a KFC two piece salad.

My only question is whether this tail is pre or post squats and lunges?  If it’s pre, she might truly be working with a little something en route to moderately thick white woman status.  If it’s post, well, then I can only applaud her for beating back the negative arse virus that so many of my people are susceptible to. 

Yep, that’s the money shot.  Let me just tell you.  To me, this ass is the ultimate compromise.  I mean, I have friends who will tell you that they don’t even care about a woman’s ass at all because “I don’t use it.”  Shocking but true.  And then I have boys like Brock who insist on that thick thunder or they’ll just walk out of the room.  As an advanced white dude I can honestly say that while I don’t think this is a “fucking great ass” like some of these other simple-minded bloggers have called it, I do think it’s objectively respectable and workable.  All in all, this ass is indicative of where we all need to come together as a united people.  Don’t get me wrong, if I had it my way, we’d all stop off at Kardashian’s or Vida’s ass.  But this ass right here, in my view, represents something we can all agree on for now at least, namely, that most of us would hit and use dat ass to the best of it’s ability. 

Am I right or am I right?  And no I didn’t say what her name is because as the Rock used to say, “it doesn’t matter what your name is”…. Ok, Kristen Bell, happy?

– Lake