Posts Tagged ‘Jay Z’

Beyonce Makes One Thick Cop

September 17, 2008

Damn. Those government issue pants don’t leave anything to the imagination.

In other news, Jay-Z has reportedly just been inspired to remake N.W.A.’s classic “Fuck tha Police”.

-Brock

Maybe Rappers Should Write Shit Down

July 8, 2008

You know Us Versus Them backs Lil Wayne big time.  The lyrics are hot, the metaphors are creative, the dude pumps out hundreds of free tracks a year, and he makes every remix hotter.

Wayne takes great pride in the fact that “I don’t write shit ’cause I ain’t got time”.  This might be controversial.  I think he needs to write some things down.  Honestly.  Look, here’s the problem.  Top five rappers dead or alive involve the following people:

Biggie

Jay-Z

Lil Wayne

Nas

Eminem

Yeah, I left Pac and Rakim off the list.  Rakim was well ahead of his time but still an 80’s rapper…so he rapped like an 80’s rapper.  It is like Wilt Chamberlain, respect is due but he couldn’t hang in the modern era.  Pac?  I love Pac, but the more I listen to his old stuff the worse it gets.  Part of the problem is the fact that the world is flooded with trash verses that he never intended to come out…dammit, I’m on a tangent.  I’ve gone all Lake on y’all.

Anyway, back to the point.  At the top of the list is Big and Jay-Z.

Two that have had ridiculous success and have risen into legend by revealing the fact that they never write down lyrics.  Here’s my thing, they aren’t the best because they don’t write down lyrics.  They are the best and they happen to not write down lyrics.

Sure, the fact that “I Got a Story to Tell” and “22 Two’s” were both written without putting pen to paper is crazy.  But that is something that comes across after the fact.

Nas writes it all down, he’s got lyrics for that ass.  Eminem writes things down in some crazy ass ADD all over the page scrawled out, crumpled up paper type shit.  Once again the lyrics and the flow are crazy.

Wayne hasn’t exactly dropped the classic story rap.  At least Dr. Carter has a little bit of a theme, as does Mrs. Officer but those aren’t those classic story raps.  Wayne boasts, Wayne brags, his flow is insane as far as his ability to create rhythm and ride the beat.  But here’s the deal.  I don’t know how Big did it, but Jay apparently rides around the city pulling lyrics to a song together in his head.  Wayne comes into the booth, drops 4-8 bars…

…smokes some weed, sips some syrup out of that triple Styrofoam cup, and drops another 4-8 bars.  Once again, this dude is the hardest working man in the bitnah of rhyming, and he gives me more free tracks for my iPod than any man alive.  But I really think the dude could step his game up if he sat down and applied himself.

For instance, “OK you’re a goon, but what’s a goon to a goblin”.  So upon further research, here’s a goon:

Tough guy, classic thug.

Here’s a goblin:

Funny looking little green guy.  I guess he could be magical…or something.  I don’t know, I don’t play Dungeons and Dragons, my local dungeon master isn’t around.  I’m taking the goon, he’s gotta be strapped, right?  Now see, if Wayne had some more time to think about it, he could have flipped that around.

On the real though, that shit ain’t a badge of honor, write it down perfect it.  Kanye ripped the Lollipop remix.  Super creative stuff, and you know Kanye worked until he got it just right…with his crazy ass.

Here’s to the beginning of the write shit down movement.  Go ahead, tell me I’m wrong.  Hell, Us Versus Them could use an editor, our shit would be better too.

-Brock

Guilty pleasure: Shawty is a 10

December 31, 2007

Despite the fact that this is yet another high-pitched cat doing his best Alvin and the Chipmunks do R&B impression, I must admit, I like this song. Roll the tape.

I don’t know, maybe it’s the way he pronounces the word “ten”. Anyone who says “Tea-ee-in” is relatively cool with me. Additionally, this song is a clear nod to R. Kelly. I mean, everything about the way the song goes is pure aRa and I’m all in as a lifelong R. Kelly music fan (he’s a low cat otherwise). I’m also down with the Jay Z “And I don’t need no hook for this sheeeit” reference, eventhough this clown rocks that line right before he goes straight into the hook. In fact, damn near the entire song is a hook. Oh well, I also have to give it up for the French Bulldog cameo too.

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I know, I know… Need I remind you suckers that this is MY BLOG?! Ha..

Of course, there are some glaring negative issues with this song as well. First, you have that garbage cat Jazzy Pha, then you’ve got that inexplicably poor choreography that looks like some sort of terrible Alpha Kappa Alpha sorority sisters do fraternity steps gone waaaay wrong and finally, you have the fact that the song is done by a dude named “Dream”. I mean, why not just go ahead and call yourself Delicious, Really-Fine or something equally absurd. Ok, enough, I like the song, I’m embarrassed about it and I put it all out here as my public confession right before the new year ends. I’ll do better in 2008.

– Lake

Oh and by the way, I just took a vote and by my calculations Lake is UvT man of the year. I would like to thank all the readers, the voters (which was me) and Brock for this great honor. I nudged out Justin Timberlake by a nose I’m told..pretty hot.

LJ and the Roc: Not sure I get it

November 21, 2007

Can someone explain to me why Larry Johnson is such a fan of Roc-A-Fella?

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(LJ, care to explain this?)

I don’t know, maybe it’s just me. But homey is an NFL player, so why is he throwing up the Roc sign whenever he scores a touchdown, why does he alwasy refer to Jay Z as his “Best friend” and why does this fool rock not one, but two Roc chains?

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I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but it all seems a bit over the top and quite frankly, a bit suspect. I’m not down.

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(There’s only one thing right about this picture and she’s got a dress on, ya dig?)

Kindly cease and desist player..oh and by the way, you shouldn’t be on camera poppin’ bottles like you literally don’t care that you haven’t done a damn thing for the team you’re pulling checks from this year or more importantly, my fantasy team. Terrible.

– Bitter Lake

Hot Video: Jay-Z – Roc Boys (And The Winner Is)

November 9, 2007

I’m not sure if cats have seen this video or maybe I’m just late.  Anyway, this joint is hot.  You gotta love seeing Puff, Jay Z and Nas together.   The video also has a number of other stars making cameos.  Makes you wonder though, where was Kanye?

Vodpod videos no longer available.

I was definitely happy to see my man Michael from “The Wire” in this joint too.  That cat was one the hottest characters on the hottest show on TV…  Anyway, it looks like Jay Z hit another stand-up triple with this American Gangster album.  The more I listen to it, the more I like it.  Enjoy.

– Lake

Decent Kanye spoof

September 30, 2007

This starts out slow, but it’s a decent little Kanye spoof on SNL.

Ok, that was kind of funny and pretty cool.. but it pales in comparison to this hilarious, REAL clip of ‘Ye wilin out like he aint got an ounce of good sense or home training.

Or this little gem with Kanye sporting a clean 15 pounds of extra hair, chin and face chubb.

Dude looks like he just got out the woods or something. Lookin real crazy. But I gotta admit, he saw the future, because right now, he arguably is that best. And I’m not looking all that forward to that Jay Z, American Gangster album either. Look, homey is literally pushing 40, it’s officially time to STOP rapping ‘fam’…

-Lake