Archive for the ‘College Basketball’ Category

Hoops: Blue Devils Flatten UVa, 86-70

March 6, 2008

Dude, I haven’t seen an ass whoopin like that since the JJ Redick era.

Before the game UVa’s players looked like this.

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Then the fellas stepped forward with some of this:

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A little bit of that:

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Which ultimately lead to this:

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Did Duke have to do it to those Wahoos like that? I mean, get off the canvas UVa.. Get up! Jeez. Player of the game for Duke had to be my main man (finger snap) Greg Paulus, but it was really a complete team win.

Duke Blue Devils
STARTERS MIN FGM-A FTM-A OFF REB AST PF PTS
K. Singler, F 32 8-21 0-0 3 8 0 3 18
L. Thomas, F 16 0-1 1-2 0 2 1 1 1
G. Paulus, G 33 5-10 0-0 0 2 3 3 14
G. Henderson, G-F 28 8-13 2-2 3 7 4 1 19
D. Nelson, G 29 6-10 2-5 1 4 4 2 16
BENCH MIN FGM-A FTM-A OFF REB AST PF PTS
N. Smith, G 11 2-2 0-0 0 1 0 1 6
D. McClure, F 5 0-0 0-0 0 1 0 1 0
T. King, F 4 0-1 0-0 0 0 0 0 0
J. Scheyer, G 29 3-6 3-3 2 2 4 0 10
B. Zoubek, C 13 1-1 0-2 1 4 1 3 2
TOTALS FGM-A FTM-A OFF REB AST PF PTS
  33-65 8-14 10 31 17 15 86
  50.8% 57.1%  

Still, Greg was just throwing it in the ocean from three. I really think that broke their spirit early and then Duke never looked back thanks to Greg’s play. And there’s nothing worse for an opponent than a confident, shat talking Paulie.

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Anyway, bottom line, I like the level of play and overall determination going into this UNC game on Saturday and post season play in general. I also liked how K got minutes in for Big Zoub. It’s an understatement, but the boys in Blue need to sack up and run those hicks from UNC back to Chapel Hill on Saturday.

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No mercy.

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Go Duke.

– Lake

Indiana Hoops fans finally have something to smile about

March 6, 2008

No, it’s not the hoops team, it’s this news we got about this IU student/cheerleader with a perfect body who went ahead and took all her clothes off. We didn’t really comment on the whole Kelvin Sampson debacle because the whole thing seemed pretty silly to us. I mean, yes, dude was an idiot for making all those illegal calls, especially after he got busted at Oklahoma, but there are far worse things you can do in recruiting and life than lob a few kids too many phone calls.

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Anyway, it’s no surprise that Indiana Basketball fans have been pretty down right now. Eric Gordon is a guaranteed one and done, DJ White is graduating and the coaching situation there hasn’t been right since the late 90’s. As such, we figured we’d do something to cheer you guys up like highlight one of your own… Yep, not since Jimmy Chitwood hit that final shot in Hoosiers have I been this excited about an Indiana native. Not only that but this babe is a hot cheer leading butter face who happens to have the best body I’ve seen in all of 2008. We’ll start slowly. Here’s the whole squad.

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Butterface credentials please:

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I know, I know, completely useless. I mean, you see some potential talent around that IU symbol, but nothing to break your stride over…right? That is, until you get a little more body and place her right next to a stand issue, probably 8 to 12 pounds too heavy, IU cheerleader that we otherwise have absolutely no use for:

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Very nice and that shade of crimson really brings out the definition in that waist to ass ratio.

Then for some reason that we don’t know or really care about, this same babe started taking her clothes off. Uhh, they don’t call it a butterface for nothing. On this chick, EVERYTHING looks GREAT But Her Face! Peep it.
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Let me guess, she works out. Now from what we can see (or as you will see later), everything is real. Let’s face it, that chest, to waist to tail ratio is off the meters:

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Even Kelvin got it. Damn, ladies, first off, someone call KFC. Secondly, this babe is proof that if you build it, they definitely will come.

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Damn.

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Now we know the real reason why Eric Gordon switched schools.

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My question is who’s the cat on the camera. You know he’s blazing this babe. I wonder if there’s any information we missed:

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Right, predictably the babe is crazy flexible too. Would you look at those thighs? And the clear stripper heels are a nice touch. Look, what isn’t conveyed though these semi safe for work pics is how dope her top game is. This babe has a perfect rack piece. I mean, this is definitely what Kelly Rowland was looking for when she threw those full C’s on herself. If you want to check those out and plenty of others, you can find the NSFW joints HERE.

Go Hoosiers…?

– Lake

Mason “Ma$e” Plumlee commits to Duke

February 28, 2008

Everybody knows that Duke has the horses on the perimeter to challenge any team in the nation.

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But to be honest, Duke fans were more than a little concerned when two years in a row our prime Big Man targets, Patrick Patterson and Greg Monroe, decided to play ball elsewhere.

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It didn’t help either that our rival, Chapel Hill State School of North Cakalina, made a big splash when they landed 5 big man prospects in the span of like 2 weeks.

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Anyway, with the cupboard bare for the class of 2008, Duke is looking to the class of 2009 to right the ship in the post. And I guess that project starts with Mason Plumlee.

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Huh?

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Better….

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Ah Ha! There’s our guy (far right). There’s the Duke swagger and feel you need. At least, it’s much closer than that first picture. Maybe Ma$e just needs to be around the fellas to look right…

Hey, I’m not hating on Mason. After all, the very second anyone becomes a Duke player, they immediately go into the “Us” category while everybody else is relegated to “Them” status. So really, I’m not anti Ma$e. But when you look at the scouting report on the dude he’s more of a Mike Dunleavy, Christian Laetner or Danny Ferry type of cat who prefers to float around the perimeter more than bang in the post. So really, he’s not a big man at all, just a tall guard. Now when you’re 6-11 and don’t really like to take it into the paint, people are bound to make comparison’s to Josh McBoberts errrr call you soft.

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I’m not saying he’s soft, I’m just saying homey needs to weigh more than 210 once he actually gets on campus. I don’t know. I just spoke to some stone cold Dukie bamas about Plumlee’s commitment and this was their reaction.

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Just kidding, no this was really their reaction:

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They didn’t quite get it. In response to criticism from the Duke faithful and haterz alike, Ma$on released this official statement early today:

Yo, check this out right
Plumlee on da rise
And you don’t want no problem with us guys, uh huh
M-A-dollar sign-E
And if you ever out tryin’ to find me
I think I should warn you
I get hard when I want to

Damn, let’s hope so..

– Lake

DeMarcus Speaks on the Two Game Slide

February 22, 2008

Somebody has to do something here. Hopefully this public statement from the captain will bear fruit.

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“Whatever it is that’s going on that’s keeping us from playing at the level we need to play at, we have to address it and take ownership of what’s going on. We have to hate this. We have to hate this so much that we’ll play to exhaustion, until our hearts pop out of our chests before we lose another game.”

Amen brother.

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Amen.  Go Duke.

– Lake

Super Ugly: Duke drops second straight

February 21, 2008

I know that it’s tough to win on the road in the ACC, but, Dammit, Duke shouldn’t be losing two straight to unranked teams. So I’m flipping through my tivo “To Do” list, looking for this Duke game against Miami tonight and I notice that it’s just not there. Aww hells no, is the Comcast questioning my Fanhood? So I hop in the whip and head over to Game On outside of Fenway to find a few other Duke fans checking out the game.

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Immediately I saw more of the same foolishness that I saw against Wake Forest. First, they were hitting everything. They were banking it, slamming it, J’ing us from three, pulling it up, this cat McClinton was lacing the runner, I mean, you name it, they were doing it.

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That was bad enough and we looked slugglish in the first half, but what about that patented Duke effort to start the second half? You know, that same courage and character that won the Carolina game and both Maryland games?

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It just never came. Instead, we had the scarecrow, tin man and cowardly lion special going on as Miami just thrashed us. I mean, they pushed the lead out to 15 and I was pissed. Then they pushed it out to 20 and I was literally ordering IPA drafts, and I don’t drink beer!!!

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It was ridiculous. Sure, if you look at the score, you’ll see that Duke came back and made a game of it and yes, I was encouraged by the heart they showed to do that, but believe me, this was NOT a close game. Miami whupped up on Duke from pillar to post. I mean, literally, in all phases of the game. I just don’t get it.

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Even JJ couldn’t believe it. Sure, Miami came out and gave us trouble with their match up zone. But Duke looked like they had never seen a zone before. I mean, we were throwing up off balanced threes like there were 50 seconds left in the game and this was at the 15:00 minute mark in the second half!! Our team defense was deplorable.

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Gerald Henderson was INVISIBLE. Yes, he sacked up and hit a big three down the stretch, but this guy just can’t be right physically. I don’t get it, he looks like an NBA first rounded for 2/3 of the season and next thing you know, he’s channeling Mike Chappelle out there.

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Hey, G.. If you’re not good to play, then just don’t. I mean, heal up and come back when you’re ready. But I feel like Andre 3000 when he was writing Elevators, “this shit here must stop, like freeze.” My word. I mean, I’m just at a loss. The freshmen suddenly looked like Freshmen. Yes, Scheyer ended up playing well in the second half, but homey’s play for the first 35 minutes was relatively incongruous, off-key and out of sync.

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Duke loses, 95-96 and suddenly that supposed locked up No. 1 seed and ACC regular season title looks about as guran-damn-teed as that Central Campus bus picking you up on-time. Lordy… IPA fueled rant over.

– Lake

Yawn: Duke whips Maryland again

February 14, 2008

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I think this bum Cliff Tucker pretty much sums up the dynamic between Maryland and our stalkers in a half shell, those idiot Murrland Terps:

“I cannot stand Duke.” Tucker said. “I tell people all the time, if they gave me a scholarship (yeah right) and that was my only Division I scholarship, I’d go Division II or something like that. I would never, ever go there (no kidding, you’d never ever get in). I don’t know what it is (I do, you’re on “Dook’s” nut sack). I can’t stand Duke.”

Hey, I hear the legendary Cliff Tucker.

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If I scored 4 and 2 points in each of my first two, double digit loss, games against Duke, I’d hate them too. I know, I know, he said that BEFORE he took those two ass whippings and sucked up the place with inferior play, but clearly Duke is on his mind so much that he was bound to that that L.  Hey Cliff, get your game up before you start talking shit.

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Even Herm Edwards things you should tone it down some until you actually do something in this league.  But did you enjoy Kyle Singler dropping 3 after 3 on your hapless ass defense?

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Did you like how well you’re team played only to take yet another double digit beat down?   Your team is not good.  Sure you can get up and challenge Duke or even beat a lazy ass Carolina team, but what about American and Ohio?  You know when we see results like that, we feel very much like Greg Paulus did during the game.

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It’s just hilarious.  Oh and enjoy this little run you’re making in the ACC, save for the Duke losses of course, because as soon as Osby and Gist don’t graduate and leave your team, for the NBDL, your going to get even worse.  I know, I know, you’ll have some new Juco thug come in to play in the post.  Yes, I know that’s true.  Gary is a beauty.

– Lake

UNC shows little heart as Duke rolls 89-78

February 7, 2008

The way I see it the difference in the game was that Duke came out with Kurt Angle’s three I’s: Intensity, Integrity and Intelligence, three adjectives most UNC fans are likely unfamiliar with.

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But seriously, this game was a relative snoozer from the middle of the first half. You knew Duke was going to win, it was just a matter of waiting for UNC to die that slow, uninspired death. With the exception of Tyler Hansbrough (and possibly Ty Lawson) does anybody on that squad have any heart?

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I mean, where was the pride? Where was the commitment to protect that home court? After these cats lost their Point Guard it just looked like someone came in and stole their lunch money but their big brother happened to be out of town and couldn’t protect them anymore. What a joke.

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Believe me, this was NOT a close game. Duke was the superior team, really from start to finish, but most striking was how much tougher Duke was that the Tar Heels. There’s no doubt that things would have been different had Lawson played and it’s unfortunate that UNC lost him to that ankle sprain.

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Is that an ankle brace or a gobment electronic monitoring device? My bad. But on the real, if the Refs weren’t under the delusion that Tyler Hansbrough can play a tough, physical brand of basketball and virtually NEVER foul, this would have been a legitimate blow out.

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What is this cat doing? Seriously, how many times does Hansbrough just run into his defender where it’s automatically a foul on the defense? How often does he wrestle for a rebound and then suddenly it’s against the other guy? I’ve watched him in other games and it’s the same story, hell, in my broadcast, Packer called him “A Great White Shark.” Well, that’s close to what he is, but I’ll just leave that be (for now).

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Anyway, it was a solid Duke win with more than a few gut checks from the fellas and plenty of balanced scoring across the team.

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GREG PAULUS WAS NAILS from three and just played an overall great game. He feasted on Thomas, who apparently didn’t get the memo that Greg is water from deep. Not only did he shoot 6-8 behind the arch, but they were clutch shots to boot. The UvT game ball definitely goes to the Syracuse brawler, Gregory P.

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He really sacked up. It’s kind of hilarious to say it, but UNC really had no answer for him. The rest of the fellas just played smart and within themselves with six guys scoring in double figures. I can’t lie, it was good to see Scheyer get going too.

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He was all over the court tonight, making plays and just letting the play come to him.

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That crowd full of hicks, most of whom were more consumed with their placement on Gerald Henderson’s nut sack than on the actual play in the game, got just what they deserved.

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No seriously, tell me exactly what these two chicks “wanted” from Gerald?

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Exactly. I guess those UNC guys just aint hittin it right.

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Definitely not. Those inbreds “wanted” Gerald and that’s exactly what they got.

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Happy? Now go vote for Mike Huckabee, strum that ukulele with your underfed hound howling in the background and just remember not to take 2 girls and a dude home with you after you drawn your sorrows in your best batch of Carolina Blue moonshine you undoubtedly prepared for tonight’s game..yall hear? Next... (literally).

Duke Blue Devils
STARTERS MIN FGM-A FTM-A OFF REB AST PF PTS
K. Singler, F 37 5-11 1-2 2 10 2 3 14
L. Thomas, F 25 5-7 0-2 2 5 0 4 10
G. Henderson, G-F 29 5-10 2-6 3 7 3 3 12
D. Nelson, G 23 3-9 6-7 1 4 5 4 13
G. Paulus, G 31 6-9 0-2 0 3 3 4 18
BENCH MIN FGM-A FTM-A OFF REB AST PF PTS
J. Scheyer, G 33 4-11 7-8 2 6 3 1 17
N. Smith, G 13 2-5 0-0 0 0 0 3 5
D. McClure, F 7 0-2 0-0 1 2 0 2 0
T. King, F 2 0-2 0-0 0 0 0 0 0
TOTALS FGM-A FTM-A OFF REB AST PF PTS
  30-66 16-27 11 37 16 24 89
  45.5% 59.3%  
North Carolina Tar Heels
STARTERS MIN FGM-A FTM-A OFF REB AST PF PTS
D. Thompson, F 18 5-6 2-3 3 5 0 5 12
T. Hansbrough, F 38 12-21 4-9 5 18 0 4 28
M. Ginyard, G-F 33 3-10 8-8 3 5 3 1 16
W. Ellington, G 34 3-14 2-2 2 5 2 4 8
Q. Thomas, G 35 4-8 2-4 0 3 7 4 10
BENCH MIN FGM-A FTM-A OFF REB AST PF PTS
D. Green, G-F 23 1-10 0-0 2 3 4 3 3
A. Stepheson, F 13 0-0 0-2 2 4 0 2 0
W. Graves, G-F 6 0-0 1-2 1 1 1 3 1
TOTALS FGM-A FTM-A OFF REB AST PF PTS
  28-69 19-30 18 44 17 26 78
  40.6% 63.3%  
TEAM REBS: 5

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Stay down!

Go Duke.

– Lake

Duke Versus UNC: The REAL Biggest Rivalry In Sports

February 6, 2008

Well is is sweeps Rivalry Week on ESPN, so it must be time for the greatest rivalry of all time, Duke Versus UNC. Before I get started, how the hell did ESPN think they could stretch the Duke/UNC game into an entire week of games? Kentucky v. Florida? Sure I guess… Missouri v. Kansas? That isn’t making the top ten best rivalry list. Nova v. St. Joe’s? Nah player. Anyway, I digress.

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And I know you all hate it, but as far as UvT is concerned, Duke will always be Us and Carolina will always be Them. Does it get better than this? Duke is #2, Carolina is #3, these are two of the best teams in the nation, they have a history of putting on a great game, oh yeah, and starting point guard Ty Lawson is hurt…

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Go Duke.

Just kidding, we’d rather beat them at full strength just to remove all the excuses. We need Paulus, Demarcus, and Henderson to bring their “A” game tonight if we are going to win this one. This is going to be a true battle of backcourt versus front court as the Duke guards are going to be scrapping with the big boys all night.

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You know Psycho T is going to try to be the hero. Last time he tried that, he ended up looking like this:

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Then he ended up looking like this:

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Oh yeah, you know that the Dean Dome faithful are supposed to be a “wine and cheese” crowd. Why do they call that crowd “wine and cheese”? Well, Sam Cassell said it and he meant that the crowd was usually more full of ex-cotton and tobbacy growers and big time boosters than it is real College hoops fans. I can’t lie, they usually have their students up in the nose bleeds. At any rate, you got to remember that this is UNC, so if the crowd is wine and cheese, it’s gotta be Velveeta and Boones Farm because these people aren’t the most cultured folks you’ll ever see.

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I mean, until the North came down and liberated them from themselves, their idea of a restaurant was the local Waffle House.

In the spirit of Super Tuesday, let’s count up the votes to figure out who is down with Us.

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You know the Duke Blue Devil is down with us.

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Duke Nukem is down with us.

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Dukie from “The Wire”. Ok, I’m not trying to clown, but why does this cat look exactly like Lance Thomas in this picture? LOL….damn.

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The Dukes of Hazzard. With Daisy Duke on top of that car UvT might have to do a throwback ladies post in the near future.

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Finally, The Duke, John Wayne is always in our corner. In fact The Duke once said, “Life is tough, but tougher when you’re stupid”. No wonder it is so hard to be a Carolina fan.

-Brock

I just noticed, Vitale is gone

February 5, 2008

Yeah, I read about Dick Vitale’s voice issue. It didn’t phase me that much to be honest. Ultimately, I’m luke warm to Mr. Vitale.

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Yeah, he brought some excitement to college hoops back in the day, but truth be told, the game sells itself nowadays. This aint the 80s. We don’t need all that foolishness. And in a world of over the top wildness in general, Dick’s shtick, like that of those damn Cameron Crazies by the way, is really just played out. Back in the day it was cool because everyone else was so stogy. But now in the era of Booyaaaaw-esque catch phrases, wild ESPN commercials and mass media, Dick’s game is relatively weak. Truth be told, I don’t miss him. I don’t miss his over exuberance, his terrible and often incorrect analysis, the incessant dack riding of coaches he likes and most of all, I don’t miss hearing him talk about how much he loves Duke hoops.

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That dude is a major reason why we get shitted on by refs, ignorant fans and other coaches. Sheeyut, we’d be winning games without his tomfoolery, so that’s but no thanks. Give me Sean Dockerty, Clark Kellogg, hell, even Jay Bilas.

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Just give me the basics, I don’t need all that yelling, self dealing and other assorted foolishness.. Dick, I’d never wish any ill on you and I want you to get well….just not soon and definitely not for the UNC v. Duke game on Wednesday. Terrible.

– Lake

Bobby Knight out at Texas Tech

February 4, 2008

With Bob Knight you have to expect the unexpected. As such, the General is out at Texas Tech.

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Don’t worry Indiana errrr Texas Tech fans, Bob Jr. Jr. Patrick Knight will take over for his pops. I don’t know much about Pat, but if he’s half as wild as pops then I can’t wait for his press conference as the head coach. Speaking of press conferences, let’s just go ahead and run down Bob Knight’s greatest hits.

Yeah, it was good, but it’s not as good with the bleeps. And I think they missed a few.

Check out this Lake Arlington special.  It’s a beauty.  It really gives you a flavor for how wild this cat was.  Watch this one if you don’t watch any other.

“God dammit, fuck this show!!!” What about that hot clip where he threw the chair across the court.

Or when he explained the versatility of “fuck.”

Where’s that crazy clip from the interview where he told Connie Chung to lay back and enjoy rape if it is inevitable?

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I don’t think Connie appreciated that one. Oh, what about the time when he choked Neil Reed, lied about it and then got exposed with that camera shot from the grassy knoll.

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Oh and my personal favorite is his half time motivational speech to his team. I mean, for real, listen to this cat. He was a live wire!

“Now you betta get your head outta your ass”.. Yikes. What’s the over-under on how many times Dick Vitale says “Robert Montgomery Knight” on Wednesday, 5 times? What I don’t have is that hot tape where he head butted that one cat. That was aggressive and the dude’s expression was priceless. Damn, “Knight” was a mufucka. I’m gonna miss him.

More later.

– Lake