Archive for the ‘Aubrey O’Day’ Category

Making the Band 4, Season 2 Premiere

January 29, 2008

UPDATE:  Check out the Premiere of Season 3, The Tour, of Making the Band 4 HERE

UPDATE: Check out how Diddy hit Robert with that “Bitchassness” label in episode 2 HERE.

So like any true MTB4 fan, I went ahead and tuned into that Making the Band 4, Season two premiere last night.

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And even though it sounds cliche at this point, I gotta just say it, Diddy has done it again. I know some of you have tried to get on young Lake for giving Diddy too much credit, but really who else deserves the credit, Aubrey? Medium Mike? Nah, you’ve gotta have that slack jawed, part time curl, always sun glass covered, “got something for your face f*ck Pro-active” exterior in order to do this thing and the boy is an entertainment genius.

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One thing that did surprise me was how basic Diddy looked in that first scene. I mean, did this cat just come in from a morning jog or something? Take the sunglasses off this cat right here and you aren’t working with much. And what’s with that patch of unblended hair up above his left temple piece? What, homey doesn’t have access to a club brush? I need a bit better for the Premiere bro. Moving on. I love the show concept now that I’ve seen it in action. I mean, who wants to see 1 and 1/2 juicy cats (Willie and sometimes Q) and a bunch of “nice guys” make their album and then go on tour? That’s what was wrong with Da Band and their show, not enough charisma.

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Yeah, they were crazy as all hell, but they lacked that star quality. So what do you do? You bring back Danity Kane (still don’t quite get that name), Donnie and the rest of the fellas for an “album off”. It’s perfect. You get the subplots of the intra-band conflict, inter-band conflict and the omni present who’s gay, who’s not, and which dude is going to bang out which DK chick and under what circumstances? I love it.

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Speaking of the DK babes, let’s just talk about them some. First off, what the fuck is up with Aubrey? Man, the last time we saw ole girl she was young and flirtatious with a thing for every man that walked in the room. We all swore up in down that 1. Diddy was gonna hit (which he may have) and 2. that if given the chance, any of us reading the blog could probably hit too. That’s what was so good about her. Then she just started getting all arrogant and acting a damn fool.

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And no I don’t want to hear about your “friends” and how the paparazzi doesn’t print anything about your “two charities”. Two charities? Chick, you’re one bad single away from being a damn charity case yourself, what now you’ve got a foundation or something? What’s the cause, to help underprivileged trailer girls who have to make ends meet by selling their hair for your next weave? We all know how the game goes. You aint got no real money yet, nobody does based on their first album. Pleez. You think that Making the Band money is going to last your into the 2010’s and beyond? You’re just another thin blond chick with a decent face piece, some upgraded body parts and you should be happy to play any position MTV, Lake, Bad Boy, Diddy and yes, even the paparazzi give you.

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(Is that a pout or is that just her new surgically enhanced mug?)

I’m glad Puff set her straight with that little sitdown, but what the hell is with that highly suspect picture behind Aubrey’s right shoulder? Looks like two grown men, one of which may or may not be a homo thug, leaning up with a lil too much glee. Anyway, I also liked how Puff said, “baby gurl, if you change your eye color and it affects the group, I gotta problem with that”… haaaa, translation, “before you put those tittays on dubbs and injected that collagen into your new set of Angelina Joiles, you should have consulted me.” And of course he’s right. Diddy probably wants babes who give off the young, fresh and natural vibe like Aundrea, not that desperate cougar with too much make-up, too much weave and more work than a LA low-rider look Aubrey is going for. Baby girl, tone it down. You aren’t that hype.

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(I must say she looks good here though)

All that rhetoric in the limo about “do yall know who you’re riding with” and “we’re Danity muthafuckin Kane” was just awful. Stay in your lane baby and everything will be cool. Get out of pocket and you’ll be with the rest of the skanks at the Buffalo Jills dance team tryouts inside of 8 months. Moving on.

I liked what I saw from D. Woods. I must say, I haven’t been all that impressed by her in the past. I mean, sure she can sing and that’s important, but just didn’t get how she could make it in videos and on magazine covers. That is, until I saw this shot.

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Damn! That industry coca and champagne diet must really be doing it’s job. Or did she cop some HGH off Mary J and Timbo? Nah, if she did that then she’d look like this:

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(Lordy, those thighs lookin juicer than a Popeye’s two piece)

Damn, I never really put that picture in the lab like I should have. Jeez. Yall think Robert can handle that? Incidentally, I’m glad to hear no news of that old shat talking girl from before, June, wasn’t it? Glad to see ole Rob took my advice on that one. I don’t know, all I know is baby girl is looking trim in the middle and I like it. I could almost let her get away with that sideways mullet she’s rocking, but the business on the left, party on the right wig piece (at least I hope that’s a wig) just doesn’t work for me. Plus, it lets everyone know that she’s rocking a fade up underneath anyway. I can’t respect a chick who aint got more hair of her own than Brock does. I mean, at least lie to me, like Dawn for instance.

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Hmmm, now see. I like how Dawn came back. Beyonce weave, check… Make up done, check, a little extra effort on the tail piece, even if it’s just a back arch, check. I can’t lie, when she twirled around in tight white dress with the inappropriate white thong piece, I had to catch myself for a second.

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This budding relationship between Dawn and Q may have legs yet. I also appreciate it because it could finally take Q off “you’re gay” watch, something I’m eager to do.
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On the real, you can take all the hard yellow timbo boots with the beater and tats atop a baby grand all you want, but you gotta show me some things Q and I aint talking about in the booth youngin…knock it down and no I did not buy that “I wanna cut Lorrie Ann in that blue unitard” act you put on last season neither. That shit was terrible.

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Anyway, it was good to see Big errr Medium Mike back at it. I can’t lie, Diddy did need to set ole boy straight in the studio that one time as Mike has a tendency to treat every moment like he’s back on his front porch with his dog, Butch, just a crackin pecans and playin’ on his harmonica. Let me ask yall a question though, is Big Mike gonna bag a lady this season? I don’t know, he looked a little too reserved with the ladies at the club that night. I mean, you don’t have to cut a fool Mike, but you should show a little swag my man. Get up on Aundrea…grab a lock of Shannon’s painted on red hair. She could use the boost in energy. I mean, make something happen.

Finally, I’m not so sure about my man Donnie and his chances at stardom. Ok, apparently chicks dig his look, which I appreciate. I mean, Aubrey was doing more than break her neck for him and that was with the cameras rolling.

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You just know Donnie will or already has served Aubrey up a fresh plate of ass smackities. But I’m not so sure he’ll be hitting it right. All this shy guy foolishness, it’s just not working for me. Just like that high, but not quite right, Justin Timberlake impression he was doing in that booth wasn’t quite right.

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The jury is still out on Donnie, but he better bring it home for his countrymen.

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Lord knows they’ve got a lot riding on him. Enough for now.. If I didn’t mention this guy.

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This guy:

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Or that girl, there’s a reason for it. These people just need to step their game up or Diddy needs to do something to add spice. Still, the season looks very promising. I’m looking forward to it.

– Lake

============UPDATE=============

Check out the UvT review of Episode 2 right HERE.

Throw some Ds: Aubrey from Danity Kane

January 23, 2008

UPDATE:  CHECK OUT OUT NEW COVERAGE OF MAKING THE BAND 4, Season 2, Episode 1 right HERE.

Damn, remember when little Aubrey was just a sexy young girl with the smooth stomach and open mind trying to make Diddy’s band?

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Damn near precious. Don’t get me wrong now, all of us fellas knew she had that little freak in her waiting to get out, but damn, if that era was zero, then you have to regard her current look as 60.

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Got damn. I don’t mean to be vulgar but it looks like they literally just pulled the mic out of her mouth 2 seconds post checkin and snapped the picture while the emotion was still fresh in her mind and lip pieces. And what’s with those Js sitting on double Ds? My word, baby is packing the thunder up front like the Patriots offensive line all of a sudden. For real, if they had some “I am Legend” freaknasty adaptation, this babe and her vacant, all I do is cut look, would fit the bill of a sexed out zombie perfectly.

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It’s weird. I mean, I know that I like it, but I can’t tell how much. Damn homies, this shot doesn’t even look like her. Anyway, the enhanced cans were pretty predictable, actually. It was really all that was missing. Not getting that upgrade would be pretty shocking now that I think about it. Peep the old Aubrey from her first Blender spread:

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With the exception of that wildness she’s got hanging off her naval, I’m completely with it. It looks like Aubrey from Making the Band/Danity Kane not Christina Aguilera 2.0.

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Now I can’t lie.. I liked that shot. Smooth thigh, tight midsection, J coming out to the left, parsed lips for your consideration, freakiness in the eye and vacancy in the brain… Pretty good. I just wonder what influenced her to flow like this.

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Ahh, Kimmy K strikes again. Clearly she’s moving farther and father away from her supposed best friend Audrina who likes to keep it girl next door clean. At any rate, all of these developments are good stuff in light of the next installment of Making the Band 4. Word on the street is that the guys, Danity Kane and Donny will all be competing to make new albums. Yeah, it sounds pretty cheap but I’m quite sure it will have some cuttin’ for tracks by Aubrey and hatin’ from Robert’s on again off again lady who doesn’t like the idea of D. Woods near her man.

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Lady, I can’t lie, you’ve got a few things going on, but that “Drama King” line you hit Rob with back in the day, I just can’t ever forgive you for saying it or him for putting up with all that lip.. Sorry, you lost me on that one.

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Then you know there will be all types of “Is he gay is he not” shenanigans from Q and the supposedly married Brian A. I like the show concept in principle because of all the potential subplots, but we’ll see. Oh and for all you Brian H. fans out there, whatever happened to that burgeoning career yall were predicting after he got the Puff ax piece? Oh he hasn’t been signed yet? Naaaah…

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Maybe homey can come out with a new line of hair products for recovering dreads addicts called “Nu Cesar”… I don’t know. I just wonder where all these dread lock cats are working. Come on now, there aint that many IT jobs in America… 😉

– Lake

Halloween: Tricks are the new Treat

October 30, 2007

They must pass out “be a ho” licenses on October 30th of every year, because Halloween has become a matter of “think of a loose theme and get as naked as you can”.  If you have the pleasure of getting onto or near a college campus on Halloween, you know what I’m talking about.  We’re definitely not complaining here at Us Versus Them, in fact, you know damn well we’ve collected the best.

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Okay, here’s what I’m talking about.  That girl knows damn well she just threw the bat signal on her hooker outfit.  At least she brought her sidekick, “drop it like it’s hot”.

These girls did a little better.

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Now some poor kids didn’t get to be the teenage mutant ninja turtles this year.  Those costumes were clearly made for 5 year olds.

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These chicks went for the basics.  Bonus points for matching  though.

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A prisoner?  Now this is what OZ on HBO should have been like.  The damn show would still be on.  I know, I know chicks in prison don’t look like this babe, and fishnets aren’t standard issue.  I can dream can’t I?

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Cat and Devil right?  No…just strippers with silly headbands.

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This chick didn’t even get the holiday right.  We’re gonna let her slide though.  Is she workin’ with something?  That might not be right up under there.  I can’t tell.

Even celebrities get in the mix.

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Aubrey O’Day from Danity Kane goes as Chad Johnson.  Uhhh, I don’t think that is the NFL approved equipment there sweetheart.  You do Ocho Cinco proud though.

Before I go, Halloween is also a license for clowns to make a complete fool of themselves and for a white boy to break out the blackface.

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Now how did this dude get the whole Urkel outfit?  Especially those corrective shoes he’s rocking.  Let me tell you something, there ain’t a damn thing in Brock’s closet that would get me close to this costume.  You can’t rearrange legit gear to end up in Urkel land.  Damn bruh, just damn.

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Now see.  Here we go.  I want to hate old dude, but props for not going too dark on the skin color and extra points for the commitment to the tattoos.   This looks like a sincere effort.  As opposed to this guy:

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That just ain’t right.

Damn, I gotta cleanse my palette after that.

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There, that’s better.  Seriously though, what is she supposed to be?  A present?  She was really like, “fuck a costume, how naked can I get?”  Did she buy the stripper heels just for the occasion?  My man in the back is clearly not impressed.

Happy Halloween.  UvT always has your candy.

-Brock