Dude, is it just me or is Brandy one of the biggest flame out “stars” ever? Remember back in the day when Brandy was the next big thing?
I Wanna Be Down, era? I mean, Brandy was on the short list of the artists that would be around for a long time. It was like her, Monica (who also entered into the artist protection program) and Aaliyah.
Where is she now? I mean, the babe is good for a terrible ass red carpet picture or a “Brandy killed a mofo in a benzo” story or “Brandy’s lil brother is making porn” story, but that’s it. I mean, it’s embarrassing because any of my friends will tell you that I predicted that Brandy was going to be a big star back in the day. I figured that once she took that little good girl persona and made it freaky, that coupled with some extra added thickness brought on by age and getting banged out, it would give her that extra star power bump.
Yikes. Boy was I wrong. I mean, if ever there was a “that was then and this is now” moment, it’s with Brandy. No, she’s not a big recording star as I predicted, but sadly as I was rolling through a Harlem beauty supply store (don’t ask), I saw that Brandy line of home weave products and I was instantly disgusted.
Jesus. First off, I HATE WEAVE. OK, no need for a “Lake uses juices and berries” disclaimer here, I’m just saying I hate fake hair. If you can’t flow it down the back, get that old school Halle cut.
But whatever you do, don’t bring a fucking weave around me. So you know I was extra disturbed when I saw that Brandy was like the face of the modern weave culture.
“And if you just buy my shit for $15.95, you too can have hair like me….”
Dude, it’s all just fucking awful. Forget outlawing drugs, they need to outlaw weaves. In fact, I’m less down with those weaves than I am the gelly butt. Scratching the head and the whole thing moves. Tracks coming out when you’re doing the deed…. Fucking wild undergrowth nests rising from the dead ashes while the fake stuff is holding down the top? It’s all just too much. I don’t endorse it. I can’t take it… Hell, I won’t stand for it. I mean, that’s an automatic disqualification over here. And Brandy is the Queen of All Weaves…..?
And I thought she was going to be the next big thing. Ugly for Lakey the predictor.