Chien “Manye (?)” GONE!!!

by

Hey man. I’ve pretty much left these Yankees alone this year. I mean, I know they’ve righted that ship a little bit. I mean, kinda, right? They are above .500 and while they’re literally 5.5 games out of first as I type, they seemed like they were making a little comeback. Don’t worry that they already have the worst pitching staff in the American League East AND the highest payroll in the history of Baseball. Anyway, I decided to just leave the thing be, at least, until the end of the playoffs. Right. That was until the one bright spot on that shaky pitching staff, Chien-Ming Wang busted up his foot running the bases in an inter league game.

And now they’re saying homey probably won’t be back until September. Ugly. Lucky for ole Hank Steinbrenner there’s no salary cap in Baseball, because this little accident is going to cost the Yanks in the open market. Let’s face it, their pitching already sucked. They’ve already been out classed by the Sawks, Rays (huh?) and the rest of the AL East is breathing down their necks.

These fools best go ahead and give Jason Giambi’s steroids errrr gold thong (incidentally, which would you rather be accused of, ‘Roids or Gold thonging it?) for some good MLB karma.

But no matter what you suckas do, you’ve got absolutely no answer for the Red Sox’s still incomplete pitching staff or my main mang, Manny.

Consider the power shifted my friends. You’ve got no answer for Manny, Papi, Lowell, Pedroia, Youk, Ellsbury, and the fellas, ok? And you definitely don’t want none of Dice K, Becks, Wakefield and wild Papels. Nah. See those names I just listed, they’re stars. Yall just sitting ’round, looking like some biatches.

Now you’re gonna have to learn to deal with it.

– Lake

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