It feels so good when inspiration strikes. When you sit straight up in the middle of the night, mind racing because you have an idea, something that can help people, something that can change the world…
Here at Us Versus Them, we are ready to give back. We are ready to use our power to touch people, to improve this great nation and the world. How will we do it? Man Up Monday. Our first project?
Mario.
Well damn…where do I start? The silky shirt? The high pants? Those slippery looking shoes? The fact that it looks like his head was photoshopped on to his neck? All that glitter, or magma, or sparkles or whatever the hell that is in the background?
Let’s start here. You can’t go by one name when your name is so damn common. You have to have something unique like Madonna, like Beyonce, even Usher. When I say “Mario”, I’m thinking there is about a 0% chance that the first person you think of is this dude. If you like to eat you probably think of this guy, or if like gay comedians, this guy. The other 90% of the world thinks of this guy:
Anyway, black, skinny Mario is on dancing with the stars. As long as he doesn’t start highstepping and sliding like Jerry Rice he may leave this experience with some part of his pride intact. Look, I can’t hate too hard, check out his lady.
Cute, huh? Well, Brock knows her from back in the day. Back when she was just a young model trying to make it, butt naked riding bikes. Here’s a tame version, I’m sure you can find worse (better?).
Anyway, unlike last season, when Mel B brought me out of the woodwork to at least get a feel for the show, I will not be catching a single solitary second of Dancing With the Stars this year.
Mario…Man Up!
-Brock
====================Update=========================
Uh, Brock. Now, I won’t come out here and disagree with you directly, but I would be remiss if I didn’t say that when a man is hitting this:
(This babe is alike a doper Alicia Keyes.. yikes)
You can call him Cleetus for all I care… I mean, hot dammit, that’s his lady? Shit, maybe this “going hard thing” hasn’t been working for me. I’m a star, loyal reader KIR in NV told me so. Maybe I need to be on dancing with the stars, get me some Ricca love.
WOW. Man up player? Seems to me he’s got that thing sufficiently covered where it matters, don’t ya think? Damn a man up, if I don’t stop looking at this babe you’re gonna have to come into my office with some smelling salts because it’s about be “Man Down Monday”… That little tan dress up top wasn’t telling the whole truth. Keepin it real..
– Lake
Tags: Dancing With The Stars, Jerry Rice, Man Up Monday, Mario, Mel B
March 10, 2008 at 10:23 am |
Mario is gay, and he should know better than to wife a video chick. But I came to this site to read your acrimonious post about the loss UNC put up on the Dukies! (My hater cap is on real nice and snug).
But, I feel your pain. I only rub salt in the wound because, Dukies are a fiercely loyal (and sensitive) bunch, and just like bubble wrap, I just can’t resist. Please charge it to the fact that God is still working on me.
March 10, 2008 at 6:14 pm |
Just an observation, all the earlier pics of Nicole, she blocks her chest. Yet, the more recent ones, her “J-game” is on full display. Maybe her increased cash flow prompted some new enhancements?
And, because I have commented on just about every chick that’s been posted on here, I have some ‘splainin’ to do. I am a woman, and am not gay. I am, however, fixated on my body image, and I scower the internet for motivational images to prompt my lazy self to stay in the gym. Haterade is a helluva drug.
March 10, 2008 at 9:19 pm |
My man needs the loot to take care of (one of) his baby mama…allegedly. Honestly, if this clown ain’t handling his business as far as his child(ren) are concerned (note: hizzoes looking to get paid need to keep it moving), I hope someone gives him a left step, spin, kick to the groin with jazz hands finish and sticks the landing.
Man up, indeed.
March 10, 2008 at 9:51 pm |
Haaaa, that was great. This KIR is no joke. Not those jazz hands after the spin kick. lol.. good stuff.
March 10, 2008 at 9:55 pm |
Be On It:
I was thinking the exact same thing about that Now you see me, now you don’t J game. Care to offer any theories? Was it some extra airbrush? Deflate, inflate? Throw some Ds? I mean, it’s gotta be something because in that second batch of pictures, her breasts are bangin like a benzy… Video ho wifedom is a classic mistake. I agree, it definitely raises an eyebrow, meaning, he may be gay.
March 11, 2008 at 1:23 am |
May I be so bold as to offer my theory? Umm…I will anyway.
Those are after market, factory add-ons, throw some D’s on ’em ‘cuz my mama ain’t got J game either plastic accessories. We can’t all be blessed I guess (thank you Jesus-I promise to use them for good, not evil).