Kelly Rowland + New Breasts = Playboy Shoot

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Dammit, how did I miss this one. I should have had this post up way back in January. It makes perfect sense for Kelly to “Throw some C’s on that b*tch” en route to a Playboy shoot.

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I must say, that concave stomach piece looks about right…

Damn, I didn’t even know that Kelly was big time enough to get love from Playboy. Man, I don’t know, but I feel bad about this. I mean, Kelly is clearly a grown woman and all, but she was always the quietly cute member of Destiny’s Child.

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Ya know, she was kind of like that one chick who you peeped and knew was hot before anybody else. The kind of chick that didn’t have the weave and didn’t need to be out front. Guys know what I’m talking about, you see that talent in the babe before she sees it in herself and you know that it’s just a matter of time before she gets turned out….uh, so you try to beat the wolves to it! But eventually you know that you’ll be sitting there as the inevitable transformation occurs. It starts out cool. Sexier gear, a little more confidence…

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Next thing you know she’s rolling in the whip with your campus or neighborhood version of R. Kelly with “Pee On You” blaring out of the speakers… That girl is Kelly and that “Pee On You, Remix” is this Playboy shoot….WTF?

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You know how you get invested in a chick and just see their terrible life choices and wonder why? Again, this is Kelly. I mean, just because Lindsay took off her gear in that “artistic rendering” doesn’t mean you have to pimp yourself out to promote your album. Or does it? I know, I know, you won’t be doing anything you’re not comfortable with, you know the photographer and wouldn’t do it if anyone else asked you to, you have complete control and creative input and everyone is just so great, professional and classy over there at Playboy.

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It’s just a bad idea. People won’t look at you as a sex symbol, they’ll look at you as a hizzoe who laid down for a seedy skin rag. I know, I know, plenty of big stars did it. Right, but exactly ZERO A-Listers ever do it because they don’t have to.

And the enhanced cans don’t mean that now all of a sudden you can or should bear all.

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Damn, this alleged breast addition just happened in early 2008, can’t you wait until the swelling goes down before you start taking it all off? And if you were going to make some improvements, why not your ass piece?

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People would just assume you’re getting naturally thick, but it’s fairly obvious that those breast-tah-sis were not made by “the Hugh Heffner on High”…ok?

Shyut, I like the old Kelly.

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Smooth in that mid section yall. I mean, she could really get it. Don’t get me wrong, because she can still get it, but it’s just for different reasons now. With that said, we’ll have those Kelly skin rag pics as soon as they come out. Don’t worry about that.

– Lake

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One Response to “Kelly Rowland + New Breasts = Playboy Shoot”

  1. TYRONE Says:

    KELLY U DISAPOINT ME U HAVE A BEAUTIFUL VOICE AND A BEAUTIFULL BODIE BUT THATS NOT WHAT GOD HAS PLANED STAY BEAUTIFUL KEEP SINGING GOD GAVE YOU A VOICE AND A BODY FOR A REASON A WRITEBACK MY EMAIL IS CROSBYCOUGAR45@LIVE.COM

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