Paris Hilton Reconsidered: New Evidence

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I know we’ve already questioned Paris Hilton and the very nature of her celebrity. We’ve asked if she was still hot, why she is famous, and how she keeps popping up in the news. We all know she really got famous once that sex tape hit the internet, and I don’t think anyone can even look at Paris Hilton without thinking of that room washed in the glow of night vision with those raccoon eyes staring back at you while getting bucked by old boy.

parishiltonnightvision.jpg

Tell me I’m wrong.

Anyway, here is my problem with Paris. I know she’s not hot, she’s definitely not my type (body type that is, she’s definitely a freak and down for whatever, that in fact is my type) But then she breaks something like this out:

golden-paris.jpg

Not I know she is physically airbrushed, then digitally airbrushed, then they obviously dropped her in the middle of some photoshop stock backdrops. This is the teaser ad for her new champagne, Rich Prosecco. Dammit I know it ain’t right, but once again once you’ve seen a chick get banged out, a picture of her butt naked with a look of ecstasy on her face makes this picture worth more than a thousand words.

I still don’t think she is UvT quality, but I appreciate the fact that she is stepping her game up.

In the battle of the body paint, I’m still going to have to go with Rihanna.

rihanna-body-paint.gif

Silky smooth right there.

-Brock

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5 Responses to “Paris Hilton Reconsidered: New Evidence”

  1. We drink the wine Says:

    Now see, I don’t know. Rihanna is just a platinum brushed Paris without the “I’m willing to f*%$ hard” and provide extensive, dedicated and directed face activity… We don’t know what Ri Ri comes with in the sack and thus, she shouldn’t be trusted. We know Paris comes to win and we know, at very least, when a dude takes her into battle with him, he’ll get her best or should I say, be put in a position to give his best, thereby getting her best and then we all rise. You feel me? Then again, for her battle efforts, Paris is a known carrier of the clap, so strike that. Island voodoo aside, Rihanna is more likely than not, clean…right? Damn, maybe I should just find me a young, pretty thing and call it a day. Good post.

  2. Dirk in Dallas Says:

    I’ll take Paris. I gotta get mines and with her, Imma get mines.

  3. Ricky Says:

    That look on Paris face in that first night vision shot is crazy and I must admit, pretty hot. I’ve seen that look before. It’s the look of confusion. That “I’m fucked” but in the way you want. Paris going away.

  4. We Drink the Wine Says:

    Dude, you’re sick. First of all, those enhanced golden tits have been digitally blown up. She doesn’t have that, not even siliconed. False advertising is disgusting, especially on a woman. Thanks for Chris Rock for pointing that out. “that aint your hair, you aint that tall, that aint what your face looks like, you aren’t that skinny, everything about you is a lie”…

    give me the Island diva.

  5. Lake Arlington Says:

    Rihanna can’t dance. Rick Solomon got his and then some. Nuff said.

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