Classic material: The Rain by Oran Juice Jones

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It really can’t get better than this classic joint by Oran Juice Jones.

What’s so hot about this joint is how he’s looking at her at the end and continuously adjusts that waistline of his pants. LOL. So good.

And then the lines in this joint. I mean, seriously, this cat laid down the standard for all silly interludes to follow. How many classic lines? There are too many, so I’ll just go ahead and bold all of my favorite joints within the entire epilogue.

Hey, hey, baby, how ya doin’, come on in here
Got some hot chocolate on the stove waiting for you
Listen, first things first, let me hang up the coat

Yeah, how was your day today, did you miss me?
You did?
Yeah, I missed you too
I missed you so much I followed you today

That’s right, now close your mouth ’cause you cold busted
Now just sit down here, sit down here
I’m so upset with you I don’t know what to do
My first impulse was to run up on you
And do a Rambo

Whip out the jammy and flat blast both of you

But I didn’t wanna mess up this thirt-seven hundred dollar lynx coat
So instead I chill
That’s right, chill

Then I went to the bank, took out every dime
Than I cancelled all those credit cards, yeah
All your charge accounts, yeah

I stuck you up every piece of jewelery I ever bought ya!
Yeah, that’s right, everythang!
Everything
Get fly with me
Nah, don’t you, don’t go lookin’ in that closet
‘Cause you ain’t got nothin’ in there
Everything you came here with is packed up
And waiting for you in the guest room

That’s right

What was you thinking about, huh?
What were you tryin’ to prove, huh?
You was with the Juice!
I gave you silk suits, Gucci handbags, blue diamonds
I gave you things you couldn’t even pronounce!

Now I can’t give you nothing but advice
‘Cause you still young
That’s right, you still young

I hope you learned a valuable lesson from all this, you know
You’re gonna find somebody like me one of these days
Until then, you know what you gotta do?
You gotta get on outta here with that alley-cat-coat-wearing
Hush-puppy-shoe-wearing crumbcake I saw you with

‘Cause you dismissed!
That’s right

Silly rabbit, tricks are made for kids, don’t you know that?
You without me like corn flake without the milk
It’s my world, you just a squirrel tryin’ to get a nut
Now get on outta here
Ah, don’t touch that coat!

That was just perfect. Perfect. We all should know that it set the stage for so much future rhetoric. I’m convinced Nino Brown’s speech in New Jack City was inspired in part by this.. and just as an aside, how hot was THAT scene, in fact, let’s just run that joint right here, right now!

“You’re incapable of running this shit…sit your 5 dollar ass down before I make change.”

“I never liked you anyway, pretty muthafucka.”

And you just know Neyo’s “Irreplaceable” sang by Beyonce was based on this same thing. So influential. So good.

– Lake, I’m so old school

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One Response to “Classic material: The Rain by Oran Juice Jones”

  1. Nupes Says:

    Lake,

    I personally believe the beginning to “Don’t Save Her” by Project Pat has some of the greatest commentary:

    “Imma kill dat nygga…and Imma murrry her!” gets me evrry time.

    But this OJJ is classic too.

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