Man, I’m way behind on this.
But after checking this show out on my flight the other day, A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila was immediately placed in the upper tier of my tivo priority list. And boy oh boy, was I ever sleeping on this chick Tila.
By the way, I’m quite sure that tail is an optical illusion. I mean the babe is only something like 4′,9″ but it sure looks right from here. Let’s take it to the video replay:
Upon further review, this chick is bad and my tailpiece admiration stands as called on the field. While not thickened up about the arse like a Bojangles two piece, it’s definitely an asset and she moves it surprisingly well…I guess that’s what they mean by “Afro-centric Asian, half freak, half amazing…” Gotta love it.
Never again will I take this babe for granted. Yeah, I read about her before in Stuff/Maxim or one of those joints, I guess she’s some hip hop artist.. Whatev, none of that matters.
(Except this cover, that matters. Oh silky and lean, you gotta be a female boss to strike that pose and make it come off, love it)
What does matter is how damn hot this little chick is.
WOW. I mean, peep this babe.
Not only that, but the babe is technology savvy with a penchant for showing off all her goods (NSFW), our kind of girl. I mean, it’s not Noelia good yet, but it’s damn good. The babe has the most myspace “friends” because she’s got naked pictures of herself (NSFW) all over the place. Now, I don’t myspace and I sure as hell aint her friend (but I want to be) but you know Lakey the Don will lace you with those ropa free, NSFW nude Tila pics RIGHT HERE. Wow, it’s aggressive and they appear to be using limited airbrushing (I had to preempt you haters), just how I like it.
But of course the story doesn’t stop there. We have this lovely show, A Shot at Love, to watch every week for the sole purpose of seeing Tila in wild exotic outfits and crazy sexually charged situations… oh and some of these lesbians are right too. Peep it:
I love trash TV like Flavor of Love and all the derivatives, because they play off that basic concept from the Bachelor: tens of insincere and superficial aspiring actresses looking to boost their careers before plunging themselves direct-it-tally into the porn industry eeeeerrrr surprisingly attractive singles, looking for a meaningful shot at love and maybe even marriage with that right special someone!!! Only this is better because it just dispenses with all the foolishness concerning a “connection” and places the focus squarely where it should be: on how hot and outrageous (in that order) the losers on the show can be en route to their self-degradation.
But this show really did take it to the next level. It kind of reminds me of what Gerard’s pops said to Marcus in Boomerang, “but you can’t stop there…see” and Marcus said “see I would have stopped at the mushroom belt” and then ole pops showed him the special mushroom lining inside. See, that’s what A Shot at Love is. It’s the extra special mushroom lining that you didn’t know you needed until you saw it coo-wooordinated with everything else. Then you just sit back and realize, damn, all this time the one thing that was missing from I Love New York was the most obvious thing: a legitimately banging ass star who takes her clothes off and kisses up on women!!! Add to it a bunch of lesbians with tight bodies (and maybe a few butter faces) and keep the loser dudes for comedic value and you have the perfect show, giving you every-single-thing you want and need. GENIUS.
(Mayne, on that first episode Rebecca brought that thunder and it only made me wonder (yes, that was a Ginuwine reference))
In the end, a bunch of hot ass lesbians and terrible ass dudes competing for fine ass Tila? I’ll take it. I appreciated how Tila kept it real on the first episode too. She bounced out every single chick who wasn’t tight in the thigh and sneaky in the eye — just how Lake would have done. Hell, I need a show. Same deal, a bunch of straight chicks in the house with a bunch of lesbians/bi-sexual babes, all fighting for the love of Lake. In fact, that’s the name of the show: The Love of Lake. Now that sounds about as hot and original as it gets. I think it would work…Viacom, call me. We could do like a Duke Basketball, stripper and vodka infused crime (I’d be thieving hoes) melo drama with a DNA test at the end of every show and a laugh track throughout. I’m all for it.
I can be reached at 212- ext. 228!
– Lakey the Star
Tags: Afro-centric Asian