Mike Vick: Up in Smoke



So let me get this right.  At the end of the 2006-2007 season, Michael Vick is a franchise QB in Atlanta.  Living the good life.  Huge bonuses, endorsements, his own shoes.  Producing magical moments that have not been seen in football ever before, like this:

The run when he made two professional players run into each other because they hit nothing but air because Vick is just so fast.  He may have never been a Hall of Famer, but he would have put up numbers in certain categories that may never be touched.

Here we are in week 4 of the 2008 season and this guy is looking at a year or more of Federal Jail Prison time for dogfighting.  The NFL is going to suspend him for at least a year.  The Falcons want their bonus back (and probably Matt Schaub who is set to torch them in Atlanta this Sunday with his 2-1 Texans against the 0-3 Falcons).  With all that, Ron Mexico thinks it is a good idea to break out the purp with his brother Marcus and blaze a few?  What was he doing, watching Half Baked and thought “My life is all f*cked up, but I wonder what my f*cked up life would be like….on weed”.

Damn Homey, your situation is so bad, I asked Maurice Clarett what he thought, and this is all he had to say:


It’s a damn shame, really.  You had an uphill battle before but you can guaran-damn-tee that NFL Commissioner Goodell is going to make sure your chances of stepping back on the field are about as good as Notre Dame making a bowl game this year.

I had your back through all of this, I thought the charges were BS, I thought they hit you too hard, I wanted to see you back in the league.  But you are bringing it on yourself at this point.  You are really telling people you can’t stop, you can’t control yourself, you don’t know right from wrong.  I guess we know what that “dark particulate” was in the water bottle with the hidden compartment where you kept your jewelry weed.


I’m like a biiiiiird, why don’t you fly awaaaaayayaaayyyyyaaah.




Mike Vick has disappeared.  He has assumed an alternate identity as Billy Ocean. 


Caribbean Queen, now we’re sharing the saaaame Dreaaaaams!


One Response to “Mike Vick: Up in Smoke”

  1. kmitch Says:

    niceeee lol

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