Southwest Airlines policy on travel attire: “Clothes before hoes”


UPDATE: Kyla decided to pose nude in Playboy. Click HERE for our update STORY!

Meet 23 year old Kyla Ebbert, a chick who got kicked off a Southwest Airlines flight en route to Tuscon Arizona from San Diego because she was dressed too provocatively… Indeed, the “college student” and Hooters girl got the “heave ho!” from a SWA employee named “Keith” who took one look at her and said:

“I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to take a later flight. You’re dressed inappropriately. This is a family airline. You’re dressed too provocative to fly on this flight. ”


(she’s second from the right, yeah, the orange one)

This chick? Nah, can’t be. I can’t imagine that she’d ever wear something inappropriate or revealing in public. She looks so shy and virtuous. Peep her replica throwback outfit she rocked on the “Today” show with Matt Lauer in order to catch the eye of Playboy errrr tell her story so that other young women who are comfortable with their bodies don’t have to be unfairly objectified, belittled and humiliated by Corporate America ever again. Peep the gear:


(look, it’s not hard to imagine how a different shirt underneath that green thing would look significantly more whorish than this breast and stomach covering number she decided to rock for the show, nice try)

First thing I noticed…there have been some ahem enhancements added to her upper chest region. Not so shocking for a bottle blond with orange skin. The second thing I noticed, she doesn’t have on the black tank top she had on the day she got kicked off, which of course changes the whole look of the outfit. Hmmm, I wonder why she didn’t rock the exact same gear on the “Today” show. I smell a rat. I love it.


(bare footed and damn near naked, gotta love the free spirited white woman)

Look, I’m basically ok with Southwest Airlines having a no hoes policy on their airline. Now I’m not saying she’s a ho, but let’s face it, she had the hoe uniform on. And anyway, they reached a compromise on the matter. SWA let her get back on once she made “adjustments” to her gear to make it look more appropriate, so what’s she crying about?


What I’m more concerned about is this “doctor’s appointment” she needed to travel to Tuscon, Arizona for in the first place… Let me just tell you, if she’s trying to upgrade those cannons she calls breasts to something bigger, then she might as well just start chartering flights, because she’d be obscene in a Glad bag if those things got any bigger. If anything, she needs to tell whatever quack she’s going to see to do something about that sun ravaged catchers mitt she’s got stapled to her neck piece. I thought it was mama Ebbert when I first saw that grill.


(that is not the face of a 23 year old, looks more like a young Skeletor right before he turned evil)

She may have the body of a 23 year old, but she’s got the face of chick riding in the HOV lane to Cougar-ville!!! And you know she’ll be suing the airline soon enough for Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress. After all, she already said they humiliated her which I find hilarious. You’re a Hooters chick, you’ve proven if nothing else, you’re used to being humiliated.


Hell, I always thought there was a section on humiliation in your employee handbooks over there at Hooters. You entire job is predicated on a general lack of respect for yourself and the customer’s right to humiliate you over some beer, wings and some delicious blue cheese dressing. In short, you’re used to it. Even your mom knows what you’re about:

“My daughter is young, tall, blond and beautiful,” Michele Ebbert said, “and she is both envied and complimented on her appearance. She dresses provocatively, as do 99 percent of 23-year-old girls who can.”

Umm, no. 99% of chicks do not rock ho gear on flights. Let’s be clear about that fact. But I think it was the great southern philosopher Juvenile who summed this situation up best when he said, “where she get her class from, she get it from her mama”… Exactly.

– Lake aka the flying pelican (Scarface reference)

26 Responses to “Southwest Airlines policy on travel attire: “Clothes before hoes””

  1. Rosy Says:

    Southwest is out of pocket again! Weren’t they also requiring overweight people to buy two seats at one point. Her outfit was fine and I would say the same if she only wore that green sweater and the skirt. Who cares — she wore what she felt comfortable wearing.
    You know some woman in wearing mom jeans with an elastic waste because her husband’s eyes came out of their socket and getting misty eyed at the thought of upgrading to his second wife got mad and complained. Let her show her goods before they shrivel up from all that tanning.
    I myself would like to come against those wearing half shirts with stomachs hanging out, low-rise jeans showing thong or worse yet crack, tapered jeans with white sneakers, negative ass on men and women, and sweaters with holiday decorations but I am a progressive so I live and let live.

  2. Lake Arlington Says:

    Haaa, classic rhetoric. Glad you’re pro holiday sweaters and ho gear alike. Very nice. Me too by the way. haaaa I’m pro ho.

  3. Southwest Airlines: Clothes before hoes, part 2 « Us Versus Them Says:

    […] first they jammed up ole leather face for being dressed like a H to the Izzo in the sky, now […]

  4. Uppity Watcher Says:

    As Kyla stands up look exactly between her and Matt and notice the exact synchronous hand movement of Matt and Kyla’s mom. Mom will move her hand rapidly up to her ear and swipe it twice. (Why???) Then watch mom move her eyes up fast.

  5. JoyGirl90 Says:

    Hey why wouldn’t you show Kyla Ebbert’s new Playboy video

  6. MonkeyMan Says:

    Southwest should be able to do whatever they dang well please. Its their business, don’t like the rules, fly Delta. Any person that is so fat they pile over into another seat needs to cough up money for two tix, why shouldn’t they?

  7. The Sad Poet Says:

    I’ll bet you’d be singing a different tune if it had been you being discriminated against.

    One would presume that a black man in Amerika would understand discrimination.

  8. MonkeyMan Says:

    A) My race doesn’t matter, nice racist assumption
    B)Learn how to spell AMERICA

    Overweight people in the country (the United States) is one of the biggest problems we have and its only getting MUCH worse. As long as my tax dollars are going to pay for all of the medical problems they will incur directly because of their obesity they should have to foot at least some of the bill.

    I got an idea, lets go sue Augusta National because I don’t have enough money to join, thats DISCRIMINATION

  9. Watch OUT Says:

    DO NOT CLICK ON JoyGirl90’s link to watch the video of Kyla.

    That site wants to try and install some bullshit malware, supposedly required to watch the vid, and it WILL try to infect your machine.

    Don’t do it!

  10. Brock Hardon Says:

    My bad. We killed the link that Joygirl posted.

  11. Jinxxed Says:

    I love how idiots say they don’t want women to disrespect themselves while calling them whores or in the stupid slang of todays teenyretarded language “hoes”.

    You’re such fucking hypocrits it’s not even funny.

    But please go on, i love the smell of envy in the morning.

    All i got to say is you go girl, you make the money off of this and anyone disturbed by your appearance is stupid and you know what they say about idiots and their money, they part quickly.

  12. Kyla Ebbert Part 2: Dough Before Clothes « Us Versus Them Says:

    […] Ebbert Part 2: Dough Before Clothes Us Versus Them covered Kyla Ebbert being kicked off of Southwest Airlines for dressing too suggestively months ago, but now she’s done it again. Miss Ebbert is stretching out her fifteen minutes of […]

  13. Wasontheplane Says:

    I dont envy a person that has so much confedence in themelves that they have to show off their orange (fake tan) breasticles and belly ring to a plane full of families (the black spagetti strap top she wore on the plane was about 1/8 the size of the white tank top she wore one TV, it revealed the tops of her nips and stopped about 3 inches above her bellybutton). Kyla seems like the type that depends on her body for everything (barely passing highschool, working at hooters, then using playboy for money) so i guess shes lucky that her mama gave it to her. Im interested in seeing whether or not she’ll have to use her natural born luck her whole life or if she actually has anything substancial upstairs…

  14. Ned Says:

    My wife thinks the trash should be emptied everyday. She’s not the one who does it. My friend Steve thinks everyone should give all they can to charity. Steve receives alot from charities. Women who believe women are not for looking at are usually not much to look at themselves.

  15. FireRupee Says:

    Rosy, you sound less like a “progressive” and more like an apathetic, plain and simple.

    And Junxxed, “hoes” is the dialectal word for “whores”, not something the teenytards just made up.

    ..And what’s so bad about holidays exactly?

  16. B-radd Says:

    I went to school with this chick, and unfortunately had to live around the corner from her. She shows no more class than her suburban redneck parent’s. she had better start praying now she doesn’t end up looking like mom!

  17. Casca Says:

    Um, folks? SWA is a private airline. They have EVERY right to ban people from flying for whatever reason they please. If they required their passengers to wear clown shoes while on their planes, the passengers must do it or fly elsewhere.

  18. Tony Says:

    That’s the problem with all these MF, they are just too concern about everybody else’s fucking business. For those who love to bash, go ahead and look at yourself in a mirror and tell me what you see!!! anyway, if I was going to have a lady sitting right next to me on a flight, i much rather have her than any other fat, stinky bitch that does not take care of herself and all she does is to bash the ones that do take care of themselves………jealousy?? of course!!

  19. FireRupee Says:

    lol I am soo going to wear clown shoes on my next flight.

    Well.. then they might pat me down for bombs or something, but w/e.

  20. driver1100 Says:

    Airlines are not obligated to allow anyone to fly. They have a right to refuse service to anyone, like any other business. But then again, if I was the pilot on that flight, she would have been offered a two hour tour of the cockpit….

  21. Jennifer Says:

    I can’t stop laughing at your bitterness. You are just pissed because you know she would never let a ghetto loser like you into her pants in a billion years. Its sad that anyone who thinks they can type is allowed to spew thier garbage all over the internet and clog it up for the rest of us. LOSER

  22. Lake Arlington Says:

    Ghetto? I live in Back Bay!!! I love how babes just go to the “loser” card whenever they just don’t like what someone says. I’m not sure there’s anybody on this planet who couldn’t get into this chick’s pants. Remember, she just laid down for a skin rag..not exactly the hallmark of high quality woman.

  23. Dannyboy Says:

    I didn’t know Adrian Brody became a blonde tranny…

    “she had better start praying now she doesn’t end up looking like mom!”

    Too late.

  24. Boshena the Spray Tan Expert Says:

    I have a spray tanning site, and once I got a message from a guy in Africa – “Why white people want to be black?- White people stupid!” Looking at those photos above I must agree. I always thought spray tan was to give you a glow to enhance your natural features and not turn you into a chocolate monster (white person with black skin? – that is same as Michael Jackson turning white!).
    For THAT horrible fake tan I would throw her off the plane. She is giving spray tanning industry a bad name.

  25. Xander Says:

    Hi Brock! Great site man. Was just trolling through the net and I came across this post about Kyla Ebbert. Just gotta say, I’m real glad I was not the only one who thought she was way out of line with this clothes crap.

    I’m hoping to entice you into taking a peek at my own post on the subject and maybe give an opinion on it there. I’m still new to blogging so my site is not as big but I’m working on it!

    Keep up the good work!

  26. Philosopher 8 Says:

    You envy the power that attractive women possess, which you do not. Attractive women are not helpless pawns, suffering under an ever-present Testosterone Tyranny. They are empowered by their attractiveness just as a man is empowered by his willingness and ability to dominate other men. Attractive women can parlay this power into a variety of roles whereby their influence and relevance is felt. These can range from being the wife of a powerful/wealthy man, to advantage in the business world (men don’t fight as viciously against a hot woman as they would a non-hot woman or another man), to these kind of direct parlays of sexuality into significant income. All of these feminine power expressions are completely moral, noble, and are rational ways in which women have wielded their power since civilization began. Feminists disgust over them is simply sour grapes at their own deficiency in wielding power along natural feminine avenues. Like it or not feminists, you cannot and should not seek to abandon these biolgically-indicated tendencies and pretend you are men – you are not.

    The entire objection that feminists have to these women and these activites is simply envy. Feminists envy the power of these women, and so seek to undermine them by depicting them as whores, pawns, fools, and slaves to men. But these women USE men, and profit by their innate ability to transfix their attention. The average feminist is nowhere nearly able to wield this kind of power, and so they begrudge those women who can. At its core, modern feminism is an attempt to get men to treat women like men, thereby empowering themselves and simultaneously undercutting the long-standing base of feminine power which they simply lack.

    A women can wield power directly like a man, but this is not the state to which the average women ought to aspire. Some women can do this exactly as well as men, and these should be given full opportunity and respect. But the reality remains that men and women are different. Most men cannot ever hope to excel at feminine activites and most women cannot ever excel at masculine activities. Feminists have forgotten that women are noble and respectable even when they exist in a feminine mode, and ESPECIALLY when they exist in a feminine mode. A real man has nothing but respect for a women who excels at all the attributes of femininity, and does not esteem her as stupid or weak for so doing.

    So we should strive for symbiosis, not competition. Feminists, because they are deficient in feminity, try to grasp power by competing with men as another masculine being. And while some women can succeed in doing so, the vast majority of women really don’t have what it takes to be a good man. And why would they? THEY ARE WOMEN!

    Until feminists stop this envious war with their more feminine sisters, and stop competing with and emasculating men; our society will never achieve the synergy needed for justice for everybody, and peace in our midst.

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