Oh my! This is turrible. Deelishis has a video?!?!

by

Deelishis…can I call you Lishi?  As good as anything else.  We need to talk, about this:

I hear you.  A girl from the D has to stretch out that fame as long as she can.  But damn girl, that right there is turrible.  Those showt shawts ain’t working with with ya, their working against ya.  I know the song is called “Rumpshaker”, but your ass is giving a return on investment of 5-7 extra shakes every time you move.  Don’t get me wrong, I like to see a little extra pop with my lock and drop, a little extra shake with my shimmy, but something ain’t right back there.  Now I know you hooked up with Busta, but when he said “Make it Clap” he meant the booty cheeks, not the thigh with the back of the knee.

Then there is that dance break.  You already couldn’t sing in the beginning, not you have to prove you can’t dance too?  Not necessary girl.

Then, when I already can’t take it no mo.  When I’m ready to tap out, you bring in…who the hell is that?  Well it doesn’t matter, because you immediately turn yourself into a videho in your own damn song!  What the hell is that?  Beyonce doesn’t sing the first two verses then make one booty cheek pop while some random rapper drops their 16 bars.  (Okay, just once, in that Deja Vu video, but Jay-Z is her man, and they kept it in the fam)  Oh and yeah, limit that cat to 16, how long was that dude rapping?

I’ve already talked about this for too long.  ‘Lish, here’s your best bet.  Locate the camera.  Turn your body172 degrees in the other direction.  Bend at the waist while arching your back.  Look back over your shoulder.  Smile.  Make them promise to airbrush the photo.  Other than that, you either need to make plans to get on a nationwide strip club tour or apply to DeVry or University of Phoenix or something so that you can figure out how quickly you can pick up a skill you can use.  Why? Because I think you’re only going to get fifteen minutes of fame, and right now, the UvT stopwatch reads 14:57.

-Brock

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: